Questions on arousal and how to think during a session

So I’ve got a few questions about arousal and thought process during a session. I know the aneros does really do anything by itself, and you need to be around using it. I’m trying to determine what arousal really means. For example I can feel horny or think something is hot, but I don’t think that really elicits a physical response. If there’s porn on, it doesn’t really do anything except give me the urge to touch myself. If I’m touching myself I get a physical arousal response of an erection. The same if I’m trying to have a fantasy in my mind, it doesn’t really do much. However if I’m touching myself and fantasizing, I get a physical response and I can “engage” more with the fantasy. Should I be causing physical arousal response aka an erection before inserting? After inserting? How does arousal play into the use of aneros?

Following up on starting arousal, how should I be thinking of maintaining it throughout the session. Should I be fantasizing, listen to erotic audio with a story, try to keep my mind blank? I think some of the larger issue is I put the aneros in and have a now what response. It doesn’t feel wildly good just sitting there, practicing contraction is kind of meh, trying to just relax and feel things practically puts me to sleep. I’d like some thoughts on how to think/what to think during a session. I know everyone is different and there’s no right way, but currently using the aneros is about an hour of trying various things and then finishing myself off with my hand.