Author: Shadow66

Some reflections

Just jotting down little ideas that pop into my head at random times during the day. Things that I might wish to look into more, or just observations being made. Postcards on the journey!

Seat warmers
I’ve got them in my car, and I’ve noticed since I started this journey, that when I use them, I get cool p-waves and flutters down there. I don’t use seat warmers very often or for very long usually, but now I’m getting some pleasant feelings. Not distracting me from driving, but just a general addition to my level of sexual feelings.

Constant Arousal
I’ve become much more aware of how high my level can get to, and that awareness of course, serves to heighten it more. It’s winter right now, so I’m wearing hoodies a lot, but sometimes I’ll crank the thermostat a little to shed some clothing. After my morning shower, I’ll usually walk around the house wearing just underwear and a t-shirt. The underwear is made of modal material and is very sleek and form fitting. It keeps the package out front more, which makes me aware. The shirt is usually a workout shirt featuring dry-wick material. It rubs against my nipples through the day. Read more »

New Areas

Sunday morning and even after my hot and wild session the night before, I woke up horny and heightened. I spent the morning after my shower doing odd jobs in my underwear just to try and keep cool. But I couldn’t keep my hands off myself and I would pause to run my hands over my ass and abdomen and nipples. I kept getting hard and at one point I took my penis in my hand while standing in the kitchen and imagined a hot babe on her knees in front of me, helping me relieve the pressure.
By last night, I was cranked right up and after an especially elevating shower, got to work with the Helix. I had spent the usual time breathing and self exploration and by insertion time, I was rolling into it! I had some minor shaking sessions and after about 15 minutes, I felt confident enough to give the Progasm a try. Lube up and pop it in. Even though it’s pretty massive, it didn’t take long to start feeling what it was ready to give.
My penis started to get hard and I started some shaking. I put my scrotum between my legs and let go for a few minutes. By then, it was rock hard, so I pulled back my foreskin and started some stroking. Now as I stroked, my hips would thrust back and forth. I stopped stroking when I felt streaks of energy flashing through my shaft, just like when I’m ejaculating during regular masturbation. I started rubbing my hand over the tip of my penis and felt a little pre-cum on my hand. I was so far into it at this point, that I pulled my hand up to my mouth and licked it off and started nursing my fingertips like nipples. Then, as my penis was still hard and stretched out, I started rubbing and pinching my nipples. I grabbed a clothespin off my nightstand and put it on one nipple. The flash of pain was exquisite and I cried out loud as the pain flew to my core, translating to something like a stab in my perineum and scrotum. I pulled the pin and started stroking myself again. With my body arched back like a drawn bow, I ejaculated and felt liquid streaming out of my head. It was clear, and instead of spurting in the air like a normal shot, it flowed in a stream, over my abdomen and thighs, onto the sheets.
I released some tension from my anal muscles and finally the Progasm backed off a little. I kept some tension on, just enough to keep it in and let myself calm down and catch my breath. I decided, that was good enough for the night, and cleaned up both of my friends and went to bed. I could still feel waves rolling up from time to time while laying on my stomach, but I resolved to try and get a good night’s sleep.
That was fine as long as I was awake. About 3 am, I was awakened by shaking and moaning, and realized it was me. Mini-O’s aren’t a bad way to wake up. I toyed briefly with the idea of going further, but I was tired. It was 3:30 by this time, after all!
One of the greatest side benefits of the Aneros, is that I’m waking up with a raging erection every morning! Good morning!

Was it real? NSFW

Saturday night is usually pretty quiet. Watch some Netflix and that’s about it. This past Saturday was more like unreal, or maybe even surreal. I had done the usual routines and was in bed with my Helix. Breathing and contraction routines were complete and I was just relaxing, enjoying some nice waves and sensations as the Helix jittered away. I started thinking about this hot girl that I know who I would love to get into the sack with. As I fantasized about her running her lips over my nipples, I could feel my breath quickening. My cock started getting harder and I reached down and slid my foreskin back. I stroked my head a few times and then let go, because now she was running her hands over my ass, squeezing with her nails. This made me flex and then BAM! Helix was deep inside me, slamming back and forth for all it was worth. My legs straightened out and my back arched and I went stiff as a board. I was running my hands all over myself, and I was squeezing and pinching my nipples, triggering more and deeper penetrations than I ever thought possible. I rubbed my hand over my face and slipped a fingertip into my mouth, sucking it like it was her nipple, flicking my tongue across it. Then I bit it and my hips started thrusting back and forth. The image flashed into my head of me behind her, driving my cock into her between those beautiful cheeks. I could feel cum throbbing through my cock as I thrust in and out of her, even though I wasn’t. I was raving aloud, basically going from groaning to screaming “Fuck me” over and over! My world had vanished by this point and my neck is tight, the muscles corded as I drive it back further. I felt the most immense orgasm sweep through me at this point and I was sure that I had soaked the entire world in which I existed. I know that if my windows were open, the entire neighbourhood would have heard my wordless scream.
I slowly start to come down as the flash bulbs are going off in my brain. I’m panting and gasping in the distance and I curl up, hugging myself as I slowly shudder my way into a dark existence, waves, heavy with pleasure rolled back and forth over my body. A light sheen of sweat covered me from head to toe and I think it was probably ten minutes before I came back into the room. My little Helix started twitching again, but I decided that I had been to some unbelievable nirvana and I needed some time to absorb it all.
What amazes me two days later is that when I got up, I hadn’t sprayed a drop anywhere. It was all inside my body and my head. Three more times that night as I tried to sleep, I would wake up, either starting, or in the middle of an orgasm. The opticals were like throwing a stone into a smooth pond and watching the circular waves move outwards. Gawd, is this going to end? I really loved this session, getting dirty and maybe even a little angry, or maybe just aggressive. I think I’ll have to try it again sometime!

Shaking in the Calm

I was thinking after my T.O. on Friday morning that I might be out of commission for a while. SO I thought I would use the downtime to do lots of reading and research. As an added bonus, A neighbour who I had done some work for, gave me some cash so I was able to buy some more tools for my toolbox. I had been torn between a Trident Maximus and a Trident MGX. I had thought about the Trident Eupho, but my reading had shown it to be for more advanced users. With this added cash in hand, I decided to do some shopping. I found a site, Global Sex Toys, selling the Maximus, MGX and Eupho for 70 bucks minus a whopping 25% first time customer discount. This should be lots of fun; I won’t know which one to try first!
By Friday night, I was feeling randy again, even though I’d had a T.O. in the morning. I stuck with the Helix and shortly after I started, I was enjoying the usual dancing routine. I had been reading Rumel’s post in the archives (Instructions-Older Version). I realized that to really start reaching new levels, I had to try and simmer down the shaking and improve my breathing. I grasped that reducing or eliminating the shaking would allow me a better chance to feel whatever came from the prostate and other areas. The Helix is so much more subtle that I felt that gentler shaking would be easier. So when the shaking starting, I eased the contraction slightly and let my head loll back a little. Per Rumel’s advice, I started stretching my legs back, very, very slowly, so as to not break the wave of feelings.
With the shaking reduced to a bare discernible vibration deep in my lower core, I focused on the feelings from my prostate (a kind of humming), the gentle tapping on my perineum from the p-tab, and the movement of my sphincter muscles as they helped the Helix pop in and out. With the realization of those feelings, came the waves, heavy and warm with promise and pleasure. My head stayed back and my legs stayed straight, my feet pointing straight down. My upper body began very slowly to move downward and then sideways, in a writhing motion. Swinging forward then back, off to one side and then another. I didn’t get spots this time, but it felt like the room was streaming with bright light beyond my closed eyes. Depending on how I held the contraction, I could reduce or increase the inner vibrations. For a very long time, I did nothing but writhe very very slowly on the spot. I heard nothing and saw nothing but the bright light sensation. When I came back, I hazarded a quick glance at the clock and saw that 5 minutes had passed by.
With a light contraction, I started back in and had the same experience, over and over for a prolonged duration each time. When I finally came back to earth after the fifth time, I took a break. My heart rate hadn’t really gone up, I never, to my knowledge, achieved an erection. But I was warm and glowing with a very light sheen of sweat on my body. I saw that an hour had gone by now, and I took a break. When I came back to bed, I was able to recreate the experience on my other side as well as on my stomach. And when I removed the Helix, I was able to get almost to that same point, but by now, I was more than good with my trip.
And I was only awakened twice after I drifted off for a couple of really good Dry-O’s.
The journey continues and I welcome all the steps, big or small!

She’s so nimble!

I’ve been away from posting for a couple of days now, and I thought I’d better post before I start forgetting things. Not like people of a certain age like myself to forget stuff! Thursday afternoon I finally got my Helix Syn. It was am excruciating few hours from then on, until I could deal with supper, and deal with the usual aspects of life. The entire time, I was tingling with anticipation and when me time rolled around, I was ready to go. Thorough cleanup, then onto the rubdown. All primed, eager and ready!
The Helix is so small, it’s hard to believe that this thing could do anything. Hold it alongside my Progasm and it’s like a toy. Lubed up I started slipping it in. I got it past the first bump and then it pulled itself in without any more help from me. I felt it leave my fingers and I wouldn’t have been surprised if I had heard a click when it locked itself in. The crack of my butt is fairly deep and this handle was perfectly nestled deep down there. No way that this device was going to rotate.
Already I could feel tingles, but I made to sure to do some deep breathing anyway. 5 minutes later, I knew I was ready. It takes very little relaxing to get over the initial insertion, compared to the Progasm, because it’s so much smaller. Right away, it started twitching and moving and the more contractions I did and the deeper I did them, the more this little princess danced around. I relaxed and let it start working. I felt much more subtle waves with this Helix than the Progasm, which makes sense to me. But I wasn’t ready for the control I had on her. A light contraction and I would start waves easing up my body. Harder contractions and I was sinking and curling up. Ease off a little and I could pull back and breath through the waves.
This little honey was dancing away on my perineum and prostate so much, but not slamming like the Progasm. Almost like butterfly wings would feel. I was getting constant tingles at my anus and I could feel it popping up and down. So much pleasure! Every position I tried was letting me enjoy the light flashing, sound blocking Super O’s. By the end of the night, I was able to start experimenting with suppressing the shaking and letting an even deeper wave of nothingness and pleasure start to approach.
Rolling onto my stomach was much more comfortable and then I was able to truly able to let the subtleties of the Helix go to work. My butt cheeks, perineum, anus, upper legs and thighs were tingling and fluttering and when I completely relaxed, p-waves would sweep in and deepen and then ease away. Trying to really get to sleep wasn’t a possibility though, because she would suddenly say ‘C’mon, let’s play some more!’
After I removed it and tried to go to sleep, I could still feel my anus fluttering and the p-waves went on for quite some time. Finally sleep came to me after a really fantastic session.
The next morning, I took care of the usual routines of life and after a really erotic feeling shower, I knew that I could definitely stand some more Helix time. After a short while, I switched over to the Progasm. I went from a nympho disguised as a mousy little librarian to an Amazon Queen who was holding me down and saying, ‘This is gonna happen!” Much more intensity and more shaking and moaning than the night before. But I knew I still had more exercise to do as of the Progasm finally popped out. Back in with the Helix. Not so much enjoyment now. I think I was still tuned to the larger device and just wasn’t feeling what the little Helix was doing. So I decided to finish off with a T.O.
That proved to be a little difficult in an enjoyable way. As I was stroking, of course I was flexing my pc muscles and I would get two or three strokes in and start curling in and then relax and repeat. It wasn’t the best finish and I think next time I have a T.O., I’ll leave the device out.

Major Breakthrough!

So, as my Helix still hadn’t shown up yet, I decided last night to get together with the Progasm, despite having trouble with it staying in. I followed my usual routines and when I got to bed, I stayed on top of the sheets for about 10 minutes, giving myself a rubdown of sorts. I use the fingertips to ever so lightly touch my skin, starting from my shoulders and running down my sides, abdomen and upper legs. I approach my nipples slowly and when I do get to them, rubbing and pinching harder and harder. All of this caressing is sending energy waves into my perineum and scrotum.
After I lube and insert the Progasm, I can feel tingling as I breath nice and slow and deep. When I can feel I’m ready to move on, I start contractions and over the course of the next hour, I had some pleasant feelings but nothing special. I removed it and took a break for about 20 minutes. When I came back to the Aneros, I took a lot longer with my breathing, about 20 minutes. Then within about 2 minutes, I started feeling the sensations working up from my prostate. As they swept through my abdomen, they went through my head as well, closing my hearing to the ordinary sounds of the bedroom. But instead of curling up in a tight ball and shaking, I started to pogo instead. My head was bobbing up and down and my legs were pushing down and pulling up. My arms were bouncing up and down. It was a different reaction to before, in that this time, I didn’t feel tight. Instead, my body was flopping, with little control. I was clamping on the Progasm as tight as I could. I felt another wave of energy coming up and I let it flow through me and envelop my head, and every part of my core. That’s when things got really wild. My head and the entire rest of my body started flopping from side to side, and my hips were simultaneously thrusting back and forth and my penis was getting hard. Vocalizing was totally out of my control, and I could vaguely hear, off in the distance, groans, moans, and whimpers. It lasted at least 2 minutes and ended only with, as usual, the damn Progasm slipped out. I quickly re-inserted it and the Super-O started again. Same as before, just not quite as intense. I had to re-insert each time and I had a total of 4 Super-O’s. I pulled out the Aneros and got up to take a break.
While I sat at the table, I was moaning and rubbing my nipples, and giggling at the same time. My anus was fluttering and I had buzzing through my cheeks and perineum. When I finally returned to the bed, I decided to go Aless and see what would happen. I was up so high at this point, that within a minute or two, I was going through another 2 SO’s. Not quite as intense as that first one half an hour ago, but still extremely satisfying.
I rolled onto my stomach and decided to go to sleep. I wasn’t thinking of anything in particular, and before I could stop it, another lesser Super O rolled in. It took me by such surprise, that I couldn’t even contract and breath to try and keep it going. When it eased, I could feel more Anus flutters and tingling, and within a few minutes another one rolled in. I was ready for this one and managed to turn it into 3 multiples.
Now, I’m starting to worry that I’ll never get any sleep. I rolled onto my back and thought about ways to stop things. Then, I remembered Penis,NOT and took hold of it. I started another orgasm right away, and thought that that didn’t seem to help at all. When it eased off, I was left holding a hard penis, sexual level on extra high.This sucker was red and stretched at the end, but remained dry. I said out loud, ‘Fuck, I need a pussy to shove this into!’ That started me off again. I turned onto my side, still holding my penis and as my hips thrust back and forth, my arm was slapping against my thighs as I held on. At this point, the slightest sexual thought pushed me over the edge, and I ended up seeing spots again, with my head and arms flopping around.
After, I really tried to calm myself down, but my body wasn’t quite done. I had several more Dry Orgasms as the night went on, and by 3 am, I thought the worst was over. I continued to feel flutters and tingles, along with twitches all over. Somehow I managed to fall asleep.
I’m glad I was able to sleep in a little this morning.

What a day!

I no sooner finished writing my last entry, then I was having more of these sensations! I think, from what I’ve read in the descriptions that these weren’t Super-O’s, but rather dry orgasms. With little effort, I was having these Aless moments all afternoon. I even had to knock off practicing kegels in the car because I could feel one starting to come on. The last thing I needed was to start curling up in a ball behind the wheel and drifting off the road into a tree! I was pretty excited though, because I was heading to the post office to pick up my newly arrived Helix.
When I got there, I was disappointed to find out that the delivery would be delayed due to weather! I was all set to get back home and shove that thing in me and tap into all of this sexual energy that was still roiling around inside! So instead, I decided to go home and “put up” with my Progasm, my new friend for almost two weeks.
I lubed up and put her in and even while I was doing my breathing, I was getting tingles, telling me that I was ready within just a few minutes. I immediately started into my newfound exercises and it wasn’t long before I was curling up tight as a sow bug and the experience was even better than Aless. I was still having trouble keeping the massive Progasm in, but despite readjusting after every shakedown, I was still able to bring on the feelings!
I had an inspiration after several moaning sweaty tingly sessions. Exploring with my fingers, I found that the Progasm was not all the way in past the second bump. I spread my cheeks with one hand and found that it went in and seated perfectly near the top and felt just fine! Then I relaxed and breathed normally, feeling actions from my prostate and and ass. Then suddenly, things changed. The p-tab started tap-dancing on my perineum, and I could feel my prostate vibrating against the Progasm. I started curling up again, but this time it was different. I wasn’t bouncing in the same way, but more shaking. It felt different, although strongly similar. My moaning sounded different too. A lot more shaking in my voice as the shaking in my body was so pronounced. I was curling up in a ball, but now with my eyes closed, I was seeing green spots, and I had gone completely deaf. My arm, which had been under my pillow supporting my head, was suddenly out and flopping against the pillow repeatedly. I was completely lost and having the time of my life! And then, just as it was ebbing, I felt the p-tab going crazy again, prostate buzzing and I was all set! Then the damn thing popped right out.
Sonuvabitch! More kegels in the daily planner. The problem is that when I’m in a highly charged sexual state like today, doing kegels just sets me off. But I will power through if it means I can get waves of Super-O’s! Yes waiter, I’ll start with some kegels, then for my entree, some more kegels, then for desert, even more kegels!
I finished the session off just after that, feeling really good! Still highly charged, but feeling pretty peaceful!

Don’t throw in the towel!

The sessions I had on Saturday and Sunday were nothing to write home about. Not that I would be writing home to tell anyone about this! At any rate, Saturday night wasn’t disappointing, it’s just that nothing really happened, beyond a few light P-waves. Sunday night was a little better, with stronger waves attempting to push through but not quite making it. I’m still having trouble with the Progasm wanting to work itself out.
Now Monday night. What an interesting evening, even though it didn’t start out that way. I’d had the shower and cleaned up. I settled into bed with my Bose noise cancelling headphones. Some sexual Binaural beats from youtube while I looked at erotic photos of women. Then some meditative breathing followed by a couple of rounds of contractions. I had found out that my Helix Syn would be delivered Tuesday, and I suppose that was on my mind. As well as thinking about whether the Progasm was staying in place caused some preoccupation and really didn’t help me. I got up, used the washroom and had a drink and then re-lubed and re-inserted. I let my mind completely relax and didn’t think about much of anything. After a time, I started feeling some fluttering and slight movement of the Aneros. I let the wave move up my body and suddenly, SLAM! The Progasm was jammed in right to the handles, and tight! Holy cow, it felt like I could have hung from a clothesline! It stayed in me for a long time, although I wasn’t getting any really strong feelings of pleasure. It felt good, don’t get me wrong. Very good! It stayed tight like that and then eased off a bit, still buried deep. The rock hard erection that had popped up, faded away too. I was all set to do a few contractions and enjoy whatever came next, but a four-legged varmint decided to change all that. My cat decided to move, and wouldn’t you know it the damn thing decided to park right against my ass! Okay, so that’s coitus interruptus!
So I got up, had a dart and read for a while. I had removed the Progasm, cleaned it and put it away. It was getting quite late and I wasn’t really up to more. Nonetheless, I laid down on my side with a pillow between my knees. I thought a few nice P-waves would be a nice way to finish the night. So, I contracted everything tightly and held until I started to shake. Then, I started feeling a light flutter around my anus, tingling in my butt cheeks and a different kind of wave gently starting to spread. I knew regular breathing would probably block it out, so I tried something different. Half breaths, with exhalation loudly and forcefully through a circular mouth. As I exhaled, I forced my emptying belly inward and down toward my centre. The wave would come back a little stronger each time I did that. My prostate and perineum started coming alive and I noticed that I was involuntarily moving. My head was moving down and my knees were drawing up as I finished each exhalation. I started shaking and soon I was moaning and groaning loudly, without even thinking about it. I was clenched up in a tight ball and my penis felt like it was ready to ejaculate. Outside sound and space vanished. It lasted for maybe 5 seconds and then eased. After a moment I contracted and released again. It started to build, I changed my breathing, and BAM! Curled up in a little ball again! More vocals, a little louder and more special breathing, and it stayed about 10 or 15 seconds. I felt like I was onto something unbelievable and so I did it 4 more times, each one a little more intense. Then I thought I’d better stop as my back was getting a little sore. Go to the kitchen and read and back to bed about 20 minutes later. While I’m reading, I can still feel fluttering throughout my lower abdomen, scrotum and prostate. Okay now, seriously, it’s time to go to bed. Onto my stomach for sleep. But the devil in me says, c’mon! Try it on your stomach. Yep, it worked, except that now my head is sliding down the bed and my ass is heading for the ceiling. And my penis dragging along the flannel sheets as I head skyward really intensifies the feeling of ejaculation, even though nothing is actually happening. I did it one more time like that and decided that position bears future investigation! Once more, then 2 more times on my side and now it’s really time for bed. 2:45 am and I’ve been at it for about 5 hours. I had a few gentle p-waves as I drifted off to sleep with, I’m sure, a smile on my face!

And On Into A New Day!

So, after last night’s revelations of ecstasy, I slept like the dead. When I awoke this morning, my body felt serene and at peace, and oddly, still in a very heightened state of arousal. While I was eating my cereal, I couldn’t keep my hands off my nipples. I was fluttering and lightly p-waving and then I had my shower. I have the shower head on the usual needle setting and when I used it to clean the undercarriage, the feeling was unbelievable! Tingling and fluttering and butterflies blowing alpenhorns! Gawd, I couldn’t keep my hands off myself and I wandered around the house naked, stroking my neck, nipples, sides, ass cheeks and legs. What the hell? Why not give it a try. As soon as I crawled back into bed, I could feel waves starting. Pillow between my legs and a very little contraction, and I was soon breathing my way into 4 more! Then two more on my back! A little while later, two more in my easy chair! After lunch, two more in my kitchen chair and another two in the easy chair! Even now, as I type this, I can feel how my body is disconnected somewhat and if my abs weren’t sore, I’d do some more. But first, I’m off to the post office to pick up my Helix Syn!

Exciting progress!

The last few days were not achieving much. A few little buzzes but nothing at all like I’d been experiencing last weekend. So I went back to then and determined what had worked and also did some more reading. In the Archives, Rumel had a post called Instructions. After reading it thoroughly, I realized I was getting in too much of a hurry. And after posting a question about my Progasm popping out, BigGlansDC reminded me that I have to keep working on the kegels. So I did my usual routine and got into bed did 15 minutes of deep breathing exercises. Before I was finished, I had become used to the Progasm being in place and could no longer feel it being there. Then I started about 20-30 anal contractions as per the instructions. And then, onto the next stage of doing hard deep contractions and holding them through several breaths, until my pelvis and upper legs started to shake. I did at least 30 of these and then began to relax, but remembering what BigGlansDC had said about kegels, I remembered to keep a little contraction going, just enough to hold the Progasm in. As I do more kegels through the day, every day, I’m hoping to get to the point where I don’t even realize that I’m doing a small contraction to hold it in place. When I get to that point, I’ll be able to take that focus away and give it to my prostate sensations.
Well, wow! It wasn’t long before I could feel contractions happening all on their own! This peristalsis was rocking that Progasm all by itself, leaving me with nothing to do but face and embrace the oncoming wave.
I could feel a wave of energy emanating from my prostate/pelvis upwards through my abdomen. My package felt felt like it was wet, and indeed, I could feel true wet coming from the tip of my penis. As I relaxed even more, I forced myself to keep breathing, and ended up panting. As the wave moved through my chest, I could feel another wave starting in my head. When it was pretty much all consuming, I lost sense of everything around me. My eyelids were flickering. I could hear the inside of my mouth making a sound like pop rocks fizzing, but without the taste or feeling. My head felt like it was turning to see things around me, but my head wasn’t moving and my eyes weren’t seeing. This went for at least 2 minutes. When it began to ease, I refocused my mind, so to speak, on my prostate and I could feel the wave coming again. Again with the wetness, both real and imagined. Again with everything. This happened 4 times in total, and then 2 or 3 times to a lesser degree. After about 5 minutes, I started contractions again, and again I felt it start up. I did this cycle about 3 times, and although the second and third cycles were good, they weren’t quite as good as the first.
I found that inhaling in deep in the abdomen, and finishing my exhale quickly would start the wave and then I could focus on it and where it was coming from. Almost like pulling something that was already moving.
I had promised myself last week that I would let today be my day to have a T.O., but I’m not sure if want to do that. Although I do get horny again pretty quickly afterwards. Part of me wants to keep this up. I’ll have another session tonight and see what I feel like. Then I may hold off a few days until my Helix Syn finally arrives.