The Big Change (3 sub-sessions)

Session #4. (The "Big Change" session) This post is a journal of three 'sub-sessions' that alternated between the Helix (with a 'tab cover') and the SGX. Total time was 135 minutes. 5/15/09

Session #4a: Giving up on contractions Helix. Over an hour

This is probably what most guys manage in Session #1 or #2. I just move at snail speed.

I had planned this as a Friday afternoon adventure but was awakened at 2 a.m. by someone scratching on my arm (wasn't the dog!) So, being an 'all-american' gent I made the wrong assumption and asserted myself (she said, "not now and maybe, not anytime today.") So, there we were at 2 a.m., wide awake with fresh coffee and, sense there's little chance for sex, I'm trying to negotiate a time slot for some solo Helix-play. Also asking whether she wanted me to save some of life's essence to share after the Helix play. Or, should I just finish myself off after the session. Her answer was that my attitude appreared 'too academic' for her to get involved. She definitely didn't want an Aneros discussion and her tone was, 'testy.'

I decided to not 'shoot the wad' and would just enjoy the Aneros ride. Perhaps a couple of house bouquets in the afternoon would put me back in her good graces. (note to any reader under the age of 50: In a few years, skip long-stem roses and go for 'house bouquets.' Easy to get at a drive-through florist and the price is a fraction of what you'd pay for roses.)

With plenty of time before my Friday breakfast-club meeting I headed for the bath to prep. Tried to be careful and not overdo on the rectal rinse but on rinse #2 I produced some small chunks so did one more and put a couple of ounces up in the wrong place. (Still not getting the enema right and seem to retain a couple of ounces.) Nice shower, easy pre-lube (8cc of ID Glide) and back to bed with towels and my basket of goodies. Had a nice relaxed "edge" from the coffee.

K-Y jelly or Crisco had been my standard tool-lube since we started using the Helix for sex three months ago. But, the nightstands had accumulated a surplus of K-Y Warming liquid and K-Y Ultra gel so thought I'd try those on the tool. We had this surplus because neither of us cared for the fragrance or flavor of either product and keeping it out of range from my nose and taste-buds seemed like a good idea. While the session results were great, I'm tempted to not credit either of these lubes for the success.

Helix insertion was more difficult than on session 2 or 3 and I had to play with the lubes, finally deciding that the Ultra-gel was somewhat better than Warming liquid. Third try was a charm with the desired 'bloop' as I sucked it in.

Did some resting and small contractions on sides, back & belly. I haven't been much of a 'side guy' during this adventure and am usually eager to get onto my back or belly. Back and belly worked well and I did good rest periods; but, had no response in any position. Had the usual 'full' feeling and could contract for small movements. (travel was between 1/4- and 1/2-inch)

I've developed a fair sense of how much movement I get for a given amount of contraction. (OK, I admit that I used a mirror to peek… 8D ) I thought I was pretty well calibrated on this. By the end of this session I thought I'd need a yardstick instead of a ruler to measure !

In earlier sessions I could feel pressure on my prostate so knew I had contact but had no clue as to what else was needed. I'd been jabbing and shoving on my prostate for three sessions. Suddenly, when relaxing on my back, I sensed Helix contact with my posterior rectal wall (the nicest feeling I'd had since I started all this.) P2D ratio was a solid 12 on a 10 point scale.

Then, I rolled to my belly and, Voila! There was the anterior rectal surface with the Helix resting on my prostate. (P2D jumped to 15 on a 10 point scale.) I tried a couple small contractions and co-ordinated my pelvic muscles with some 'bear-down' moves.

Within seconds I gained co-ordinated control of my breathing, sphincter, pelvic and abdominal muscles to effect Aneros movement. Very natural co-ordination. Started moving the Aneros to explore my rectum. "OMG, maybe I'd just scaled the 'real Mahooscus' of butt-play."

My impression is that I'm tilting my anus to steer and using the rest of my abdominal muscles to propel the Aneros. Maybe everyone else has done this from square zero but for me, it was a major change. It seems to be far different from what I've read in the Wiki.

At first there was just two-axis mobility. In-out (vertical) and front to rear. I couldn't yet move it laterally. Later in the session I'd develop a sense of the left and right rectal walls and gain the ability to move from one to the other. For about 30 minutes I was able to develop very discrete motions and probe out several spots on my prostate (yes, Houston, we have contact !!!). I finally developed a nice "scooping" motion, bringing the head of Helix down to the lower part of the prostate, then sliding it upward along the anterior rectal wall to gently press the prostate upward. I was able to mentally track the movement as the Helix slid along the rectal wall and I could vary the pressure. Later I could reverse that motion, starting near the bladder and sliding down the anterior wall. Yup, p-spot found!

I think of this as a shift from 'sensing contractions' to gaining 'positional awareness.' And, if I'm able to repeat this on future sessions (and some other guys agree on the terminology) it might be a good addition to the Wiki milestones. This was the nice sliding movement that I had wanted during Session #2.

At this point, I didn't know that ID Glide had been diluted with a couple of ounces of water. The lube at this point was probably a witch's-brew of ID Glide (8cc), probably 2-whiskey-jiggers of H2O from the three small enemas and a 'flavoring' of K-Y Ultra-gel and K-Y Warming Liquid. Shame that I can't patent the recipe. (Mental note for next session… a bit sloshy is OK. Dilute the ID Glide!)

All the play was nice but I was getting pretty worked up. Suddenly I was craving orgasm. I was moving the Helix to stroke my prostate with the vigor of a 14-year old trying to jack off for the 10th time in an afternoon. My breath broke into panting and I sounded like my wife, working toward orgasm. No doubt, this was the real thing in the making. I'd climb up the hill. Then relax and slide back down. Climb, slide down.

This was probably the time for total relaxation. Unfortunately I'm a Type-A, achievement driven person who strives to add another notch in the bedpost. Having 'failed' at this, I wondered how the SGX would behave.


Session #4b (I learn about the towels!) SGX, about 20-25 minutes

I had played with the Helix for over an hour and had some static rest periods.

Out with the Helix and in with the SGX. Great mobility–much better than in session #1 and more total travel than I'd just had from the Helix. Our bedroom has mirrored walls so I fetched a hand mirror and 'posed' to see how much movement I was getting. …well over an inch! The bear- downs were really shoving my donut though some large excursions. (payback would occur the following day!)

The mobility was great but the prostate contact wasn't as good as with the Helix. The SGX just isn't long enough to do the whole job. Size does matter and it was pretty clear that the SGX wasn't going to propel me up the Big-O mountain. (One other SGX issue for me is that I don't get steady p-tab contact. On moderate contractions it taps on the accupressure point. On these giant excursions, the p-tab was out of contact most of the cycle.)

I was able to 'suck' the SGX upward and "grab" the stem with my sphincter. Then, with pelvic and ab muscles, shove it downward, overpowering my sphincter grip, making the SGX ridges 'zip' through my anus. So, this is what butt-play is really about! Fun, but the prostate rubs with the Helix had been more pleasureful. It was nice though to distinguish between "fun" and "pleasure." The SGX was superior though in stimulating the posterior wall and anus. So I returned to the fun of 'zipping' for some anal 'buzz.'

Warning: There is a hazard in this game since the SGX, and MGX, stems are tapered and I was increasing my pelvic force as I shoved it downward and through my sphincter.

Next, "why we have multiple towels?" That SGX "zip-play" was fun on my belly so I opted for some doggie thrusting. That's when I found out about the towels. On the third 'shove' I ejected the SGX, catapulting it across the room. I also produced a butt-burp, revealing the lube-dilution and adding to the stack of contaminated laundry.

Now kiddies, here's today's complex ethics question… "Is it a conflict of interest to get anal about not making a mess?"


Session #4c: (Panting for an Orgasm) Helix – 45 minutes

Back to the Helix. I checked out all the various maneuvers and was convinced that lube was still adequate and that I could position the Helix anywhere I wanted. Ran through a number of body positions. Finally, on my side, I was able to get plenty of thrusting travel. This was the first time I'd felt really good about 'side work.' Nice solid P-tab contact and no sense of it 'digging- in" (note I started using a rubber bulb from a medicine dropper over the p-tab during Session #2).

Helix was surprisingly agile on my right side. Far more agile than during any of the earlier on-the-side sessions. I got some fast contractions and thrusts going and was producing about an inch of rapid movement with the Helix. Then, the pre-orgasmic panting was back. My uncontrolled panting was about twice the rate of the Aneros cycling. I got up the hill a few more yards than I did during '4a' but couldn't reach a point where I felt I could let go and drop into ecstacy. Hadn't reached the cliff but I'd seen the path!

Note: Later, <helixbill> and <love_is> would counsel that this was a good place to slip into meditation.

Then, rolled over and tried it belly-down, spread-eagle, toes inward, hips rolled outward. Slightly better prostate contact so I thought I'd manage an O. I was sort of edging when rough texture on the towel brushed my penis and the distraction killed the moment. Tried again, same problem with the towel.

BTW, this was a full motion water-bed so there's no finding a stable body position–sort of like maneuvering on Jello. It's fun for couples sex, but not for extreme athletics or precise positioning. The water volume is set so that we, as a couple, can bottom out when we need some traction. But for a solo game, Jello ruled.

Gee-whiz, "those Experts do know their shit." — maybe RedBeard has the right idea with the jock.

Took a break and grabbed a jockstrap out of the closet. Rested, then back to action on the side and belly. Got a good sequence of fast contractions and tiny waves moving along the prostate and through my ribs and abs. Nice pleasurful stuff!! The panting kicked in and I'd almost reached the earlier edging point. Then, the rubber cover on the P-tab tangled with jockstrap. The experts were right about that too: When the Aneros is "floating", don't touch it.

Removed the tab cover and let the P-tab go 'bare.' Managed one more panting session. At well beyond two hours I was tiring and the Helix was running out of lube. Tried some more contactions in several positions. Nice! I was able to repeat sensing of the anterior, posterior and lateral rectal walls as well as "remap" my prostate.

The jock was a help, spread eagle on the belly, since the waterbed made it difficult to prevent rubbing against the towels. The better answer is a more stable surface.

No erection at any time during session #4. Focus seemed entirely ano-rectal and prostate.
No mb for a finish. I was still 'saving myself' for Mrs. NuBe. Next session: use a more solid surface and skip wearing a jock.

My 'flow' of pre-cum was far less than it had been for any of my 3 earlier sessions.

— Is this much ano-rectal fascination a hinderance or have I just become "liberated" ?

— Any tips on how to separate out 'prostate focus' from 'ano-rectal focus' or is that not a concern ?