I’d like to start this out by explaining I am no newbie when it comes to anal play—I’ve been sticking stuff in there for years. The problem is, I have never felt pleasure from this stuff, be it my fingers, a dildo, a vibrator, or a fixed-length insert.
With toys like the Aneros, I can lay there for hours doing the PC and anal contractions and breathing muscles to move the toy, but I feel absolutely no pleasure. I mean, it doesn’t feel BAD, but still, nothing. I have read every guide out there. If I keep it in while I have a traditional orgasm, it makes it much better.
With vibrating inserts like the Lelo Hugo, I can sit there doing contractions or breathing exercises while it vibrates inside, but it just feels like vibrations deep inside—no pleasure.
With curved dildos like the Nioy Pure Wand, I can’t even locate my prostate. All I feel is pressure when I push upwards. When I insert far enough, I hit some sort of wall (where I need to curve the toy upward to insert it farther, but I’m assuming that’s too far to hit it, anyway) and when I pull it out, I feel nothing but pressure. Not even the peeing sensation that I’ve read about commonly. If I move it too fast, my body literally tries to push it out like going to the bathroom.
With all of these, I feel no pleasure at all. I have tried every position, method, speed, pressure, and exercises that exist in this world. At this point, I am convinced that when I was born, a covert operation was performed to remove my prostate. I just want to find this thing, and I’m annoyed that even with the most expensive and reputable toys out there, I have made no headway.
If any of you have any tips or methods to help me glean even one bit of please, I implore you, please let me know. Or if I should just give up at this point. Thanks guys.
Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/aneros/comments/okpke2/trouble_getting_pleasure_from_prostate/
Try to stop jerking off for maybe week or two and try it again…
Forget you own a penis for a month at least, and start playing solely with your ass. Tried chastity? How about nipple stimulation?
Try poppers. There are some dangerous side affect. Or weed. I think once you know what you are looking for ( feeling) you be able to enjoy it.
I hear you man! I’m in the same camp. I might feel something slightly more than what youve experienced but nothing to the good pleasurable feels and Wow factor that everyone talks about. I have 3 aneros toys and have tried the lelo Hugo and Loki. I even use poppers as well.
Trust me when i say that there is no such thing as “the best toys”. The toy can certainly play a role in success but I’ve went through so many different toys, from the cheapest ones on AliExpress to the more expensive ones (njoy, lelo, aneros). It really does not matter, as many users including myself can attest that orgasm from no toys at all is absolutely do-able.
The thing with prostate play is that most users go into it with some sort of expectation and with a pre-learned mindset of how it should be done.
Expectations are absolutely killer for sensations, as they are just something that you think is possible and you want to experience that. No matter how hard you try to imagine it is, you won’t benefit from these expectations, all they do is distract you and ultimately lead you to frustration. Which kills your progress even further.
Now the pre-learned mindset is another thing to overcome. We tend to use what we previously learned about a thing (masturbation) and translate it over to prostate play. Lemme tell you, its not masturbation, thus such mindset leads to nothing. Prostate play is about letting go, and being in the moment. When males masturbate they quickly learn how to get to the point of ejaculation, quickly, it is pressure and tension. We often ignore the immense pleasure before orgasm and rush to the end. And exactly those things are what you don’t want during prostate play. This is an act of being passive, NOT active. You receive and accept. You don’t need to do anything, and most males have a different mindset and think there is a magic trick, a shortcut, a method, a technique. We do things actively, but with prostate play we need to be passive and just observe and feel. Although it seems weird but “doing nothing” is a rough skill to learn. Practice meditation and you might start to understand how this works.
It’s the same way hypnosis works, you don’t use your active – conscious mind. You bypass it and let your subconscious mind take over. The active, thinking mind is not required. You don’t actively listen to the things a hypnosis tells you, in a way that you would listen to an audio book.
Yep, on that same path here. Need to learn how to relax, clear my mind etc. Let loose of expectations, real hard. I think you are fooling yourself though that you say you dont feel pleasure. I have been playing 15+ years, I would not do that if it did not already feel good :p.
Honestly, you need to learn to feel pleasure with your prostate, and for that there is no way to rush it, there is no magic trick, and the prostate does not feel pleasurable when suddenly touched.
1. You don’t need to “find” your prostate.
We all have a prostate (unless… surgery ofc) that is within finger length past your anus muscle, that’s all there is to it, no mysticism.
2. Touching your prostate does not feel pleasurable right away.
If you expect to locate your prostate by feeling intense pleasure or a clear/strong sign (like the need to pee) to “reassure” you that it is actually your prostate, you will never find it. As I said, you just need to know that if you insert your finger inside you, and touch towards your penis, you would touch your prostate, believe it or not, no intense mind blowing sensation that would make you think “oh yes, there it is”, nope.
3. Learn to feel pleasure with your anus and prostate.
You probably have many years of experience masturbating with your penis, in fact, I’m pretty sure your first orgasm was using your penis, so you are used to that kind of pleasure, you know exactly how it feels and how to focus on it, you know how to trigger the mood and how to control it. As an analogy, most people have two functional hands, most are born with those, know how they feel, how to use them for many different tasks and stuff, yet if you ask a right handed person to write with their left hand, they usually can’t. Is the same with your prostate, you were born with it, yet you don’t know how to use it.
My advice, as a guy who can have prostate orgasms as easily as a “traditional” orgasm, is to stop using your penis for pleasure, indefinitely. If you are horny and want to feel pleasure, do it with your anus and prostate, so, to start just insert a finger touch around, touch your prostate, you probably are going to feel nothing and it’s not going to feel pleasurable at all, that’s ok. Do that every time you feel horny, and don’t touch your penis before or after, do not have orgasms or ejaculate (unless, you know, prostate). After days and weeks, your brain/body will adapt to that situation, and will start to link “horniness” and “need to orgasm” with the sensations inside your anus, and so, you will become more and more sensitive to that kind of stimulation, until you will feel actual pleasure and become able to masturbate using your prostate only. Once you have your first prostate orgasm, you can touch your penis again, bc you would have taught your brain to feel pleasure with you prostate successfully.