I’ve been interested in the idea of prostate play/massage for a while, but have never tried it. I’m 39 and married, but my wife is extremely conservative in the bedroom – unfortunately.
So, wanting to try it, since I have to go it alone, I bought the Helix Syn. I read a lot of comments and suggestions on here about what to do before I started. I had to wait until I knew I had the house to myself for a while since I can’t do it with my wife home.
I got naked in our bedroom, put on some porn, laid down on the bed and started. I lubed my finger and started to massage in and around my anus. Then I lubed up the Syn and slowly inserted it. My penis was flaccid at this point, but I didn’t touch it. I just tried to relax.
I started tightening and relaxing my muscles, trying to feel some sort of pleasure. I did this for close to an hour. My penis barely got hard, and I finally caved and masturbated to finish. Every once in awhile, it would feel like the Syn was sliding out, but it wasn’t.
I guess what I’m asking is what should I be feeling? Am I doing something wrong? I was hoping for this incredible experience – physically and emotionally. Should I lower my expectations? Should I look for other toys? Thanks for reading. Any help you can give a first-timer would be great.
Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/aneros/comments/90g59b/new_to_prostate_massagehelix_syn/
I don’t think you’d find many people here who will tell you their first time was this mind blowing experience. Instead what you’ll hear is to stick with it, it takes time to be able to process what your body is feeling and even more time to learn to use muscles you’ve never used in a coordinated way to produce those feelings.
I’ll tell you what worked for me but it might not work for you. I found that when I tilted my hips forward (almost like a humping motion) while I slowly activated my pelvic floor (the muscle you use to stop peeing) it puts pressure in the exact right spot. I also find it helpful to kind of push down around the base of my penis, making the skin in my shaft tight. Again, these things might do nothing for you but the point is it took me probably 10 sessions to figure those things out about how my body reacts to the toy.
Yeah, some lucky bastards are climaxing right out of the box. For the rest of us, it takes some time, so don’t worry too much about it. One of the things that disrupts my sessions is my getting frustrated, which is my battle; I imagine it’s harder still if you don’t get much chance to have a session, and then it doesn’t feel fulfilling too.
Spend some time checking out the Aneros forums/wiki. The best part of that is the reinforced message that this can be a journey. It’s a totally different kind of stimulation to the type you’re used to.
Re: your dick, again don’t worry about not getting hard. I was hard my first time, but that was pretty much arousal about the whole thing. It wasn’t stimulation-based. Generally I might chub a little at the start but will remain relatively soft until I really hit the magic spot; I’ve also seen videos of people doing a session completely flaccid.
And FWIW I agree with people who say not to jerk with it in at the end of a failed/unsatisfying session. Take it out before you start jerking. That will help you differentiate penile stimulation and prostate stimulation. I feel like I started to see changes after I quit jerking with it in. Might just be me, but worth trying I guess.
You should completely drop the expectation that your penis should get hard. The rules in prostate-land are more different than you can currently imagine. Just be open to that. If you need a traditional release, just postpone that until afterwards, don’t make it the goal of your session… just explore what is new.
Similar boat to you. Wife is pretty conservative in the bedroom. I have the Helix Syn also and it does zero for me.
I have not had a prostate orgasm yet, but have been close when I brought home some edibles from Colorado.
I recommend the nJoy Pure Wand. With it, I’m usually able to get some pleasure, even though I end up having a conventional penis stimulated orgasm at the end of the session.
I also enjoy the Levitt Caesar, vibrating/stroking toy. You can get it from AliExpress for a reasonable price. It is a little girthy compared to the small end of the Pure Wand.