Getting frustrated

I’ve had my Helix Syn for about 2 months now, and whilst I’ve not hat anything mindblowing yet, my early sessions seemed quite promising. Definitely experienced P-waves, and a few times caused some trembling sensations in my extremities (mostly arms/hands).

But it seemed to regress after the first couple weeks. I think a lot of it is mental – I feel like if nothing significant (I.e. Light P-wave) happens in the first 20-30 mins, I get frustrated and *that* seems to be the nail in the coffin. And no amount of relaxation beforehand seems to get around this. I’m a little annoyed in all honesty that I am not moving forwards at all, but the feeing of stepping backwards is such a mood killer.

Have people experienced this kind of stall, and what did you do to navigate it. I know that it will take time and there’s no magic solution, but tips for managing expectations would be really appreciated. It’s clear I’m getting in my own way, but I don’t know how to effectively combat that.

Also, when learning the technique, I’m a little lost on how active I should be. On the one hand I’ve been told to relax completely, let the toy drive. On the other, people say tensing the prostate is key. One thing that has gone right is that I feel a lot more able to work my prostrate when I have nothing inserted – kegals were never something I really got in to before, but I really have gotten good at them I think – but not so much with the Helix inserted. It’s like I can isolate the prostate without it in, but when it’s inserted it’s much much harder to isolate the prostate. I end up clenching my butt/sphincter too, which seems to kill any growing P-waves. What are you doing?

I dunno, this is mostly a ramble. Maybe I’m just being unreasonable about progress. I genuinely feel that, as much as I’m frustrated to not be moving closer to the super-O, I’ve bought into the notion that that’s not the focus, just the end-game, so that’s not my main issue. Just feel like I’ve stalled and it’s super frustrating. Any tips/advice appreciated!

Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/aneros/comments/97xrf3/getting_frustrated/

2 comments

  1. Keep at it. Took me 18 months to have reliable super-o. I think 8 before I really enjoyed it a ton each time and really had glimpses of what was to come. Lots of frustration too. Just keep at it. I did relaxed method. Some tensing bit usually only to build the mind-body connection to the muscles so I could learn to relax them.

  2. To answer some of the questions in the original post.

    Not sure how active I should be?

    Don’t be afraid to break your session into phases.

    Phase1: relaxing, clearing mind, deep breathing, mindfulness exercises

    Phase2: adding in some lighter to medium strength voluntary contractions, hold on the on breath, release on the out breath, continue deep belly breaths

    Phase3: LET GO, use the do nothing technique, relish in the sensations you do feel or waves of pleasure, ramp up the erotica by listening to /r/gonewildaudio watching your favorite pron etc., touch nipples

    YMMV, as always, but I’ve really come to get great results from this progression maybe 10 minutes each to infinity. When to end a session is a really good question I don’t have an answer to. When you feel ready is my advice. There seems to be no adverse effects from going for a couple hours or more, except life needing to happen.

    Good at kegals, hard to isolate PC muscles with toy inserted?

    Don’t be afraid of anal or sphincter contractions when doing voluntaies. They cause a great deal of action with the toy in their own right and they’ll definitely start triggering some PC involuntaries in time, especially when you’re relaxing all muscles on an out breath. Keep in mind that there’s a 3rd type of contractions. The pushing out type muscles. These get somewhat auto triggered through the deep belly breathing as actively pushing out easily goes too far and ejects the aneros.

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