Experience, The First

I'm jump starting this blog by reposting my forum entries…

I recently bought a Helix after considerable reading here and on the web. Today, with the house to myself (a rare occasion), I thought I’d give it a try. Going into the session, I had in the back of my mind all the positive experiences I’ve read about. The negative ones were there as well. I though of them as guideposts along a middle path—one I would endeavor to travel with an open mind. I wanted this to be my own experience, not set against the expectations, hopes, and dreams (achieved or not) of those who went before me. There would, of course, be similarities in my experience, since the journey covers familiar terrain, and we are all human.

Guideposts. Markers along the way. With those acknowledged, I began…

I’ll not detail the usual prep and position—just that I lubed sufficiently, lay on my right side, right leg straight, left bent at the knee. I lay with the Helix within me for around 10 minutes. It did not feel uncomfortable—merely a sense of pressure (or fullness).

I began some gentle contractions of the sphincter. I felt pressure and then slightly more pressure. My penis moved with each contraction but did not become erect. At this point in the session, perhaps 15 – 20 minutes after insertion, I would categorize my experience as being minimal.

I began to strengthen my contractions and time them with my breaths—contraction/inhale, release/exhale. Slowly, almost imperceptively—and this is important I think—I began to feel a slight warmth in my lower abdomen and groin. Nothing earthshaking. In fact, if you were not focused on how your body was feeling, if you were distracted away from your body for any reason, I doubt you’d even realize this “warmth.”

I contracted nearly full and held for about 30 seconds and then release. The warmth seemed to expand and I was slowly awash with a feeling, how can I describe it? A sweet longing? A warm, gentle embrace? Loving peace? And somewhere beneath it all, lurked an excitement. I could feel a far away tingling in the pit of my stomach—a tingling I have felt before whenever excited (and not always in a sexual manner).

An epiphany: If you come to an Aneros session seeking a raw, grinding, sexual experience… you will be disappointed.

I experimented with contractions, small and large, and each time I relaxed I was washed and filled with sense of well-being. Again, these sensations were not overwhelming. They were meditative. In fact, the Aneros experience up to this point felt exactly like a good meditation experience—focusing, breathing, relaxation, spreading bliss.

Again, not the wham-bam-thank-you explosion of a traditional sex act.

These contractions I’ve been experimenting with were generally well spaced and slow. I decided to try rapid contractions.

After about 10 or 15 rapid, moderately hard contractions, my penis, which had so far been dormant, awoke with a vengeance. I kept up the contractions and found my hips thrusting, my penis as hard as it has ever been, and on the verge of an ejaculation that would not come. As gentle and blissful as the first half of my session was, this was strenuous and lustful. I knew I was on the boundary of unexplored territory (at least by me). And though I could not cross over yet, I left a marker there, knowing I’d return and take that step into a new world.

I finished up with an intense penile orgasm… my mind now suddenly facing a new paradigm.

This had not been what I expected—even after reading volumes of testimonials and forum threads. While the journey is similar, the subjective experience is quite different.

My first experience—it was akin to a 3 part symphony. The first movement was very subtle. If you weren’t paying close attention, you’d hear (feel) nothing. But there was a current, low and insistent, playing nevertheless. The first movement, if given time, builds slowly, with brief swells of joy, peace, bitter sweetness… the movement, if allowed to continue, becomes one of all encompassing beauty, and then the next movement, sudden energy, a drawing up of power, a thrusting, expansive need. It is the edge of a deep climax… closer and closer, building and building… and then there is that 3rd movement, which eluded me today.

But I know it’s there and, while I’d like to experience it, it is not the end-all, be-all. The entire symphony, every movement, is worth enjoying.

It’s not just about sex. It’s not just about getting off. It’s about being and expanding one’s mind-body focus. Though this may sound like complete hyperbole, I believe the Aneros is a viable vehicle for a profound spiritual awakening. And I wouldn’t consider myself as spiritual, much less religious…. Though that may be changing.

In all, a remarkable first experience.