Fifth session—wonderful and bizarre

Today has been bizarre.

After waking I had a quick Aneros-less session to start the day.

My energy levels today were nothing like they were yesterday, though I was still getting into listening to my music while I worked. There was something else, though—not quite depression but a melancholy and anxious feeling about something I couldn't quite identify.

In the late afternoon I was getting horny and decided to get into using the Aneros again. The first hour was unremarkable, mostly because I couldn't get satisfied with the lube. I had generously pre-lubed, but I couldn't get any of it to stay on the backside of the Helix (away from the prostate) and it would keep getting dry and irritating as it seemed to attach to the wall of my rectum.

I probably should try another type of lube; I've only been using ID Glide so far.

After re-lubing a number of times, I was finally getting into it. The next 30 minutes to an hour were filled with a number of wonderful dry-Os. But then things were starting to get kicked up a notch or two or three.

For the next two full hours, the intensity of the orgasmic energy was stronger and lasted longer than I'd ever experienced before. Wave after wave of build and climax. Each left me gasping for breath, panting, thirsty… I was writhing all over my bed, twisting and turning so much all the covers ended up on the floor. My pillow was soaked. But none of that seemed to matter… what mattered was… WATER. I was parched, and I had already drunk all the water in the bottles next to my bed. What to do? I knew I had more water bottles downstairs, but that entailed navigating a flight of stairs while I was in an extremely odd state of consciousness… it's as though I was only half present in the physical, while the rest of me was off somewhere in ecstasy.

Tormented, I had no choice. I got up off the bed and climbed downstairs, relying heavily on the handrail. I was really in no condition to be doing this… in my state of mind I couldn't even be bothered to pick up individual bottles; I just grabbed what was left of the whole multi-bottle packaging. I was also moving very slowly… as if every step required great concentration.

I made it back up to my bedroom and collapsed on the bed, finally able to drink some relief. The orgasms kept coming one after the other, almost without any pause in between. Some of them by themselves must have lasted for minutes. Eventually I became so exhausted I just stopped moving; it was too much effort. But the involuntaries didn't let up, and the sweet and almost unbearable orgasmic energy wouldn't go away. Each one brought me down to primal instincts. The emotional feelings I had were that this unrelenting orgasmic energy was a creative force; maybe THE creator force. (No wonder it is associated with procreation.) Some of the orgasms brought me into a fetal position, whimpering.

Super-Os? Maybe. I'm not ready to deny it could get any better, but I wouldn't complain if it never does either.

At some point I realized my testicles were aching pretty badly, and needed some release. So I grabbed my flaccid penis and forced it into submission to get an ejaculation. (It's surprising to me now how much work it is to get an orgasm that way.) After that release my body felt about to become unconscious, so I removed the Aneros and fell asleep.

I slept for half an hour. Upon waking, the sweet call of the O was right there with me, and I began what became another two full hours of orgasmic bliss, but this time without the Aneros.

I do notice a difference in the quality of orgasms with and without the Aneros. Without the Aneros of course seems more natural, and starts out a bit milder but can easily reach the same peak as with the Aneros. Also there are no concerns about lube! The training wheel analogy for the Aneros is very apt; its presence and built-in feedback loop are a positive reinforcement for the same bio-responses I can now perform without it. The difference is the Aneros is like something of an autopilot; I seem to have a little more responsibility and control when doing things on my own.

During the last hour or so, I started experimenting with channeling the orgasmic energy through the other chakras in my body. I caused the energy to rush upward all the way to the top of my head. After doing this a number of times my entire body was tingling and sensitive to the touch of my hand, which seemed to have energy pouring out of it. My face in particular was feeling tense and my mouth and lips locked into an extremely odd position. I had noticed it do this during one of my first sessions as well, so this piqued my curiosity.

I don't remember a lot else about those last two hours, except that I was definitely in an altered state. In fact I still am. But the most bizarre thing is that after I ended that session I was (and am) paradoxically both extremely alert and feeling almost comatose. It's like everything is moving in slow motion; it took me several minutes just to figure out how to put some clothes on. Everything looked familiar and yet new and strange. Looking out the window, I felt extremely connected to the earth, and at the same time I realized I have come here from somewhere else, and I missed that place tremendously. I started to cry.

This is some powerful stuff. My life is undoubtedly changed forever.