More Admissions

Two of the most amazing and wonderful things about this orgasmic journey I am on is the awakening of my sexual response and the expansion of my sexual interest, gender wise. For most of my life arousal has consisted of getting an erection when looking at naked women and feeling the desperate need to ejaculate to seek relief from the sweet frustration that accompanies arousal and erection. By its nature arousal for me was 100% cock and female focused. Ejaculation was a much desired but fleeting experience. I remember after I discovered orgasm when I was young I used to fantasize how amazing it would be if I could sustain the sensation of an orgasm for more than those extremely pleasurable seconds of pumping bliss. In the absence of that skill I replaced the fantasy with the reality of unending masturbation; I would tug to orgasm a dozen times in a day. Sadly though, the more times I came the less pleasurable each successive ejaculation became.

For years fantasies of anal penetration intrigued me; occasionally I would watch videos of guys masturbating with curious fascination as I got modest erections. I experimented with home fabricated devices for anal penetration; in the places that I lived, sex toy stores were not around every corner. I could best describe those early anal penetration experiences as not thrilling, except for the visual aspect of seeing an object penetrate me.

Then in my mid 40’s I discovered Aneros. I read the forum threads with a racing pulse. Nine years ago there was no chat here, just the inanimate posting of questions and waiting patiently for responses. After I purchased my first Aneros (it was an MGX), the first six months of attempts were more of the same disappointment that I experienced with my home made toys and objects. The only difference between my initial non Aneros experiments and the Aneros attempts were the elaborate prep I went through and the hope that I would be rewarded based on the stories I read in the forum; 6 months of effort got me nothing but a sore asshole, I was trying too hard.

Then came the miracle of my first super O and after that my rewiring; suddenly not only were multiple orgasms possible but I found myself getting seriously aroused by male erotica and cocks in particular. My taste in female erotica altered as well; I turned to being seriously aroused by seeing real women masturbating and losing control in orgasmic rapture. I was particularly aroused by seeing inner lips twitching and vaginal opening drooling. My sexual experience remained unchanged with women; sex with women was limited to my wife and our normal intimacy. We did do some different things (than most conservative couples); we had always been adventurous so there wasn’t an awful lot that was drastically new to turn to. Our sexual repertoire has always been decidedly oral, so things like mutual analingus, prostate massage and having her suck my balls were well established routines in bed.

It was in discovering the pleasure of sharing male sexuality that my greatest hunger arose. The discovery and sharing of sexual thoughts, fantasies and the experience of male sexual response in real life was my new frontier.
The last 4 years have granted me the insight to perceive this incredible pleasure, the courage to write and talk about it and the desire to gain new experiences to fuel my growing sexual appetite. Rewiring allowed me to shed the anxiety of fantasizing, talking about and experiencing what turns me on in male sexual intimacy. I have only had two brief sexual encounters with guys, neither were long term relationships, just interactions with guys who were like me …. curious. In effect both were nothing more than experimentation between two guys who were turned on by male arousal and wanted to experience pleasure from male sexual response. On line communities and chat in forums has revealed to me that there are a lot more curious guys out there than I ever thought. The anonymity and clustering of erotic interests in social networks on the internet is what is allowing guys to openly express sexual proclivities that would have been forbidden to reveal before.
All of that being said, what follows is a description of a combination of erotic experiences and desires that I have had involving men or hope to have involving men. Admittedly I have done many of the things that I describe, but there are others that I think of doing. Just the thought is sufficient to make my cock hard and drool precum. I produce a lot of precum.

My precum is an appropriate place to start this dialogue. It turns me on to display my dripping cock. I love seeing someone else’s dripping erection. With my experimentation I discovered I love sipping precum from a swollen cockhead or having my cleft teased by a tongue to make my prostate quiver and ooze precum and have that precum consumed by a willing mouth. Pointing my tongue until it is a rigid prehensile appendage, I will part a guy’s cock slit to probe it and capture precum from its source. Teasing a cock slt with my tongue and opening its pink mouth is extremely erotic for me. If a guy makes a lot of precum, and he pulls down his underpants to reveal a nectar coated cockhead, I relish the opportunity to sip and lick that clear passionate emulsion from his rigid pink mushroom helmet.

As I said above, oral sex has always been a preferred sexual activity for me with women. I love cunnilingus. It is the same with male sex for me. I love to suck cock as much as I love to suckle a rigid clitoris. More specifically I am fascinated and totally turned on by cock heads and ejaculation. There is something extremely erotic about a swollen cock head that is reddish purple with desire. The first time I took a guys corona in my mouth, held it with my lips and outlined its bulbous form with my tongue, my own cock hardened and began to weep my own passion nectar. I distinctly remember tracing the turgid ridge of his engorged crown and following that ridge with my tongue to the underside of his helmet to seek and massage the cleft below. Cradling his cockhead on my tongue and gently caressing it and stroking it elicited a sigh and a shudder from him. When I had my second experience I remember being confident enough to add anal and prostate massage to the act of suckling his cock. As I encircled his anus with my well lubed finger, I wrapped my lips around his shaft just behind his crown and suckled precum from his oozing cock. I rubbed my tongue against his cleft beneath his cockhead making him shudder in erotic rapture.

As he sank deeper into a warm erotic abyss, his hands came to either side of my head to hold my mouth in place to insure that the pleasure that was teasing his anus and cockhead in equal measure did not stop. With the inspired confidence of this being my second experience I penetrated his anal opening with my finger to slide inside him and discover his prostate; his anus clamped onto my finger relishing the blissful invasion and friction of my massage. His prostate was rigidly swollen in equal measure to his cock head. The initial stroke of his swollen gland with my finger tip made his cock lurch and caused him to moan in low sultry groan. As he was an Aneros user like me who was rewired the combination of my sensual oral caress of his cockhead and the gentle coaxing of his prostate with my finger caused his prostate to pump rhythmically in waves of erotic ecstasy. I could feel it contracting inside him as each spasm tugged at his cock. I had to increase my suction and the firmness of my lip hold on his cock head to keep it from being pulled from my mouth. That ended all too quickly as he had his first orgasm with me right after. Given the next opportunity I would love to sustain that prostate orgasm for a longer time before he ejaculated.

In both experiences and multiple times, the experience of feeling a guys cockhead swell and contract in my mouth in the milliseconds before his cum flows is something that I savor as a giver and receiver of male oral sex. As a receiver the sensuality of enshrouding his cockhead in my mouth so his cum has no place else to go as my climax approaches, coupled with the memory of the sensation of his pumping corona spilling a stream of thick hot cum onto my tongue in three or four hard pulses hardens my cock as I write this. I had tasted my own cum many times, but experiencing a stream of cum being pissed into my mouth is intensely erotic.

As a receiver of oral sex from a man, I recall my thoughts as my orgasm in his mouth was imminent. As the desperation of orgasm tickled my prostate and penile bulb I was almost overwhelmed by the desperate need to release. The immanency of my release and the fact that I could see my cock in his mouth drove home the reality that I was about to cum in a guys mouth. The vulgarly forbidden nature what I was about to do instilled an anxious reaction on my part. I was about to spew my semen in his mouth, that reality gave an urgency to the moment. There was still time to withdraw and pulse my cum on the bed or on him, but instead I decided to follow through and release in his mouth. So as the tingle of preorgasm cascaded into the rhythmic pumping of semen being ejected I lay still and let it happen.
The surrender of guilt or responsibility for my sexual response made it so incredibly erotic that the strength and volume of the cum that I jetted into his mouth almost choked him. The intensity of that ejaculation was also amplified by the fact that we were 69ing. I had never ejaculated from oral sex with a man’s cock in my own mouth; it was incredibly vulgar but intensely erotic. In that experience he was in doggy stance and I was lying underneath him. When I came I shot up hurling jets of cum onto the roof of his mouth. When he finally came in my mouth gravity caused the flow on my tongue to drain down my throat as I swallowed his profusely thick and slippery load.

Although I found that mutual oral release was extremely erotic with both guys, I am a slut for witnessing a guy ejaculating freely or on me. It was for that reason that I was grateful that I had the opportunity for multiple ejaculations with both of them. Admittedly the first cum in an intimate session is decidedly more copious but the subsequent ones are still very sensual nonetheless.

Because of this frotting both guys was a very erotic activity. In both meetings the set up was the same; they were on their backs and I straddled their hips so we were cock to cock and ball sack to ball sack. Thrusting the underside of my penis against the underside of their penises was way more intimate than I ever envisioned. The sensation of joining our cocks and rubbing them together by its very nature seemed so intimate yet so wrong. Add to that the fact that we could look each other in the eye as insidious orgasm took control of our genitals and forced us to succumb to the baser limbic needs of our biology, the resulting ejaculation was powerful. Witnessed cum pouring from my convulsing cock and coating his cock was erotic beyond description. For him the flood of hot cum flowing over his cock triggered his own climax forcing him to release his semen to mix with mine on his belly in a gloriously nasty cocktail.

In neither experience did I pursue enough anal pleasure. My fantasy now is to focus more attention on anal contact. In particular I imagine doing a reverse cowgirl position on a guy who is laying down. With my back to his face I envision placing his erection between my ass cheeks so that my anus is kissing the cleft of his cock. I would love to then give him a “lap dance” rubbing the bulbous head of his penis against my super sensitive hole. I can imagine ever so clearly the sensation of his cockhead lodged in my hole as I grind on it until he spews. Because my anus is so sensitive I can imagine exactly what it would feel like to have a pulsing cockhead pumping its load on my opening. The thought that he would have a perfect view of my ass with his cock head emerging from my ass crack on the down thrust makes the fantasy even more vulgar.

Lastly, this morning as I was tumbling in a cascade of mmo’s I had a fantasy of my tempo embedded in my anus as I sat on the lap of a male partner in a straight back chair so that our cocks entwined and rubbed against each other. My nipple would be at his mouth level so that he could suckle my nipple as I floated in a sea of relentless MMO ecstasy. I would really like to have an extended MMO session with a guy. I have done A Less sessions but the sensation of penetration while I am intimately involved with a guy as he sucks my nipple is profoundly erotic to me.

So those are just some thoughts on my male erotic desires and experiences . I have many more, but I fear that if I gave in and wrote them all the narrative would be so long you wouldn’t read this.

I have learned over the last several years that it is very easy for my fantasies to become realities.

Source: https://www.aneros.com/blogs/more-admissions/