Frustration, Perseverance, Success! Finally had 10+ orgasms after months of failure.

After 3 months of experimenting, disappointments, and confusion, I’ve finally had myself an experience that justifies the cost of an arenos. Through my life I’ve been anally-oriented, with a fascination going as far back as middle school, developing post-college into a love of pegging. So when stumbling across the Aneros, I figured that it would not be that much of a jump for me to achieve a prostate orgasm. Expectations, of course, are not always realized. For the past 3 months I’ve used my arenos, almost weekly in an effort to achieve the elusive prostate orgasm, and I was admittedly close to giving it up.

Sure, I had experienced a few sessions of pleasure and intrigue, and the ending of such sessions with a lubed hand made for quite the powerful penile orgasm, but it never seemed to get to the point that I’ve been reading about online. But, reading the literature associated with it, it would seem that some men take months and months to get to that fabled point, so I figured that I’d just keep persevering – the sessions were enjoyable nonetheless.

I am happy to say that the perseverance paid off. This afternoon, after getting my work done I figured I’d try it again. The previous night I went to yoga for the first time in years, I got a full night of sleep, and I haven’t masturbated or looked at porn for about a day and a half, all of which I think were relatively critical for finally ~getting there~. The result was over 10 orgasms in a row, of about 4 different types that I could discern, that had me twitching and jerking about and tensing nearly my entire body. Bright colors consumed my vision, patterns, patches of light, my entire body feeling as though it were filling up with a bright light, cresting at my head, waves of pleasure I was unsure that I was controlling or not. Holy. shit. I’m a synesthete, and never in my life have I experienced something like this – its not a fable or a marketing gimmick for sex toys. It took me a full 20 minutes to come down and out of it after I finally stimulated the penis, seeking to climax anally and with my penis at the same time. The resulting, final orgasm simply drained me of all energy, as I saw brilliant oranges and red with black speckles flood my vision even though my eyes were open. Shuddering, twitching, giggling, and breathing heavily I finally relaxed and came out of it a changed person. The experience is comparable to trying out Virtual Reality for the first time – indescribable for someone whose never been there, really. Fuck, I’m shivering just thinking about it.

I passed out afterwards for about 2 hours, totally drained before once again surfacing back to reality. I’d found a space where time was of no concern, where the space around me was no concern, but the only thing that held my attention was my own body. I don’t think I’ve ever been as present as I was in that moment. None of my previous sexual experiences were as intense .. the only thing that came close was being pegged about 2 years ago. And even then, that experience pales in comparison. It is really, really fucking incredible.

As my frustration with getting there irked me, I have a few tidbits that may help those struggling along the way:

  • Yoga. I think that this was a major part in getting my body relaxed and prepared. There’s a lot of assumption based off of my rather refined skill of penile masturbation that led me to assume that I could just sort of force it out of myself. The path to the prostate orgasm is similar to a penile, but extremely different in that it requires a lot of preparation to get to a physio-mental state to allow it to happen. I feel like preparing for a day or so before doing it helped me out a lot – refraining from looking at porn or masturbating for a day, doing yoga to stretch and relax my body definitely helped out a lot. At the risk of sounding very granola – I felt during the orgasms that I didn’t achieve it before because there was a lot of tension within me, even that my ‘chakras’ were blocked or whatever. I don’t particularly ascribe to that set of knowledge but it seems to make a bit more sense now.

  • Preparation. An hour prior to the experience I gave myself an enema, took a shower, and then ‘trained’ my asshole with a smaller dildo while I did some chores around the house, getting it used to something being there. The presence of something in there also began to put me into a sexual mood, and while it was there I looked at a few bits of porn – again without touching myself – and did a fair bit of fantasy into my fetishes. I allowed myself to get into the mindset that would allow the attention required.

  • Weed. I hate to say it, but being stoned seems critical. I mentioned before that I’m a synesthete, which means for me that I taste color, but when I’m on weed this expands to other senses; feelings in my body become color formations and among other senses, and being able to ‘see’ the sensations allowed me to chase down the color of the primer for a prostate orgasm. The orgasms themselves were a variety of colors, but all seemed to fall into 4 different groups: Deep slate, and bright turquoise, white and all colors at once, red orange and black dots, and lime green with light purple slashes. Each of these correspond also to a specific region down there. Being high also allowed me to shut out the world around me and really go deep into self-awareness, and super-sensitivity to the inner anatomy and feelings of prostate stimulation.

  • The light clench. When I first started using the aneros, I had some experience with prostate milking – in that I would use the smaller dildo on myself, and bear down, and push real hard while fucking myself, eventually ejaculating without an orgasm. I assumed there was a direct causation between the two so when I used the aneros at first I tended to err on the side of ‘fucking myself’ instead of teasing out the orgasm. I’d clench and release real hard. I have found that personally, searching for the prostate orgasm is sort of like giving cunnilingus – its less brute-force like jerking off is, and more delicate. This time around I decided to try what a lot of literature online said – clench at around 30% until you feel your anus sort of spasming … it felt to me like I was closing off my urethra when I was peeing, but pulsing, somewhat out of my control. When I felt those sort of involuntary contractions, I would try to echo it with my own voluntary contractions. This began to send me towards my destination without me knowing it at the time, but I recognize it now. Later on today, I jerked off again, and was able to achieve a pretty intense orgasm by mimicking the same contractions, and I think its truly key – at least for me – to getting the prostate orgasm.

  • Don’t assume its going to be like ejaculating. Today, perhaps defeated by not achieving the orgasms the many times I’ve tried it before, my mindset was just ‘lets see where this takes me’ and not ‘lets try to get a prostate orgasm.’ Its sort of like picking up chicks – the more you want to get laid, the less likely it is to happen. The more you’re searching for an orgasm that is similar in nature to a penile orgasm, the less likely you are to find a prostate orgasm. It had become a sort of enjoyable grind for me, but I wasn’t expecting to orgasm today. So the idea for the session was just ‘lets see what feels good, lets try out different things.’ Its really hard to explain, but the prostate orgasm is completely different, while being very similar to a penile orgasm. The difference I think, is that the tension that is released during ejaculation is not released during prostate orgasm, which is what allows for the multiple orgasms.

  • 50% mind, 50% body is really spot on. While I was in the throes of the orgasm, my imagination was running through a myriad of erotic thoughts and fantasies I’ve had. The power of the aneros is that it is hands-free, so you can convince your mind that you’re not doing anything, but something or someone is acting on you. Memories of past experiences being pegged and fucking others enhanced the erotic mindset, and fantasy and imagination put me into positions and places I wouldn’t achieve. When I believed that the physical sensations being delivered by the aneros were as a result of a fantasized scene it sent me over the edge. Being into femdom myself, I imagined that one of my exes was fucking my ass, while another was doing other things to me.

  • Perseverence. Wether or not you realize it, each time you use the aneros, you are training yourself to be receptive to these sensations down there. Stick with it, focus on that, and eventually it seems you’ll find yourself.

  • Discovery. None of the above might be suitable for you. Just as how many people masturbate differently, with different grips, with or without lube, etc, you’ve sort of got to find your own way, which means a lot of experimenting, which means a lot of failure. Remember that nothing worth having comes easy, and failure just means you’re narrowing the path towards your goal.

Overall I’m just really sort of proud that I ‘got there.’There’s a pretty big feeling of accomplishment afterwards for me, and I’m totally ecstatic that the aneros for me has lived up to the hype I’ve read online. I want to go around telling people I finally had a prostate orgasm (I won’t, obviously) so I guess I’ll just spout off here. Don’t give up, you’ll get there.



  1. Wow. That sounded awesome. I’m in the middle of learning to stop using my hands, and I’m finding it really hard to do! I get to the edge and just feel that need to finish myself off with my hand. Maybe I need to meditate more…ommmmmmmm….

  2. Congratulations on finally getting over the line! For someone like me, who has been at it for about 3 months now, reading your post simultaneously made me feel super excited and super frustrated. I will do my best to take your suggestions on board and will keep aiming for the Big O!

Comments are closed.