Seasons of My Sexuality

As you can read from the previous posts my sexuality is a complex thing. Like the seasons it transforms itself within the measure of a year, each season bringing its unique conditions, qualities and sensibilities. The torrid heat of desire for a woman and the vulgar intimacy of being with a man each bring their own memorable pleasure that resonates in the moment but lingers as an echoing memory; both harden my cock and make it ache with need. The calming chill of ecstasy and the urgency of arousal also speak to the sense of sexual seasons that I experience.

Homoerotic desire is one of those seasons that swings in and out of my life like the much anticipated chill of fall in the end of a sultry summer. Yet at the beginning of a summer with the anticipation of bathing in searing feminine sexual lust fantasies of sex with a man seem like a distant activity like raking leaves would seem in June.

The thought of male intimacy ebbs and flows. When it surfaces it finds me like a butterfly seeks a bloom. It is silent. I never know when it will land on me. The desire for male intimacy is so mysterious and secretive that one night as I lay naked in bed it lands on me, seeking my sticky male stamen. It finds me with grace and elegance that belies its masculine character; it alights on my wetted swollen cockhead which is exuding the sweet nectar of my arousal.

The delicacy and tenderness of its touch causes my stamen to harden and lengthen. Images of me caressing male erections that are keened to stone, as is mine reaffirms my desire. As I imagine coaxing the cream of passion from them, the thought causes the nectar to flow from my own erection. The fantasy and memory of laying with a man and experiencing sexual bliss with him causes my anus to twitch and my penis to vibrate as pre cum flows copiously from my slit. It coats my cockhead and entices the butterfly of male intimacy to sip my sweet syrupy offering to slake its own thirst and embolden it and strengthen its resolve to corrupt me.

The thought of male intimacy seems so vulgarly erotic to me, and it seems so forbidden. Mostly it is the forbidden aspect of it that hangs over me and gives it the erotic power over me that it has. Anything that is forbidden is desired more than the thing that is accepted.

These are the thoughts that were dwelling in my mind just a few hours ago as I lay in bed in the early light of morning as sleep drifted out of my brain and delivered me to the reality of the moment. In that moment was my wife sleeping quietly next to me in a tee shirt with her derriere exposed. As I do many mornings I slid over to her and nestled my tumescent cock in the softness of her ass crease, between her warm cheeks, seeking out the core of her heat with my cockhead. Nestling my cockhead against her anus allowed me to suck the sexual energy from her that would ignite my prostate and make it pump lustily.

Last night before bed she had sucked my stamen to erection with her warm mouth caressing it to steel hardness before she impaled herself on it as she straddled me laying underneath her. Grinding her pussy opening mercilessly on my pubic bone as her pussy gripped and hungrily sucked on my spike, her pussy drank both the nectar of my arousal and the cream of my climax, swallowing it hungrily. I held her tightly as my prostate pumped hard emptying my balls into the depth of her vagina. As I drifted to sleep with my balls drained I had the image of fruits freshly squeezed and left in a state of relaxed emptiness with the pleasant ache of gratification throbbing in my balls. The emptiness combined with the desire for intimacy that was tickling my cockhead in the early hours of morning had created the perfect storm for mmo. The seasons in me were changing.

So as the autumnal swells of dry orgasm rose in me the fantasy of male intimacy entered my cock slit and made the long journey up my spine to my brain. Once there the butterfly of male desire became an ancient and secret key. That key sought out a door that lay dormant for several months. The key was made to open just that door. The door was the closed entry to lurid fantasies of sex with men.

As my prostate pumped furiously in the warm caress of my wife’s behind, my cock root and my anus were dancing a lusty rumba that made them both ache with pleasure; as they rhythmically contracted and released they filled my anal canal and my mind with feelings and sensations of indescribable sexual euphoria. The waves of white hot ecstasy convulsed in my anal canal; they were so intense and pleasurable I feared I might go crazy.

It was the intensity of the pleasure that overcame my guilt and embarrassment and gave my brain permission to turn the key to open the door to be aroused by male sexual intimacy. As my anus and prostate thumped and pulsed their bliss I felt the key turn and the mysterious and vulgardoor in my brain creaked open.

What was revealed to me was a kaleidoscopic vision of lurid images and thoughts all of which intensified the euphoric dance that had firm control of my anal tract, perineum, and my cock and was crackling on my nipples.

There in the Cineplex of my brain I danced the ancient dance of shared male sexual pleasure. With the fire of shared male orgasm blazing firmly in my anus, pelvis, cock and groin I backed away from my wife and slid away from her to my side of the bed and into my fantasy of sex with hot men.

My cockhead was glazed with my precum. I coated my middle finger with it and brought it to my left nipple. My nipple was hard and red from the waves of ecstasy that rippled in my anus and cock root. I envisioned my nipple to be a red cherry on a sundae and my precum to be the sugary syrup that coats that cherry. I covered my cherry in my sweet syrup and implored you to suck and chew it. You complied. Imagining it to be your tongue suckling and teasing me, I took my finger and began to delicately strum my nipple. The image of you sucking my anguished nipple and the sensation of electric pleasure on it had the effect of amplifying the waves of my orgasm. They suddenly became tsunamis.

I felt my anus opening wide and clamping shut as each contraction grasped it. Excruciating ecstasy echoed into my canal as the pleasure peaked and ebbed rhythmically. With my attention focused on my anus the erotic kaleidoscope revealed an image to me of spooning a man with another cockhead lodged against my anus just as my was with my wife only moments earlier. My opening and closing anus seemed to be kissing this cockhead expressing the depth of the desire that was consuming me. Those kisses on the cockhead coaxed it to erection. I felt its hard presence against my anus in the delicate confines of my warm crack.

Suddenly I felt a need to engage intimately with a man, to taste his sexual essence and show my need and the fire of my desire by brazenly standing before him, my erection in my grasp, squeezing a fat drop of precum from my slit. There is no other way for me to express my intimacy with a man that to take his manhood in my mouth and savor it and taste his essence. So I pulled away from him and turned towards him, rolled him onto his back. Bending his knees and parting his legs I knelt between them at the altar of his male sexuality and prepared to take the sacrament of his pleasure in my mouth. Lowering my lips to his rigid prong, my lips touched the most sensitive part of his sexual anatomy. I kissed his frenular cleft tenderly and repeatedly. As I did I gathered my precum on my middle finger and began to do a tantric massage of his anal opening.

His cockhead carried the faint scent of my anus, a situation that only served to inflame the orgasm that was wringing my anus. The magic of erotic bliss was now rushing into his anus and was making his prostate come alive to share the ecstasy that was consuming me. He began to push his cock against my lips. I teased him by inserting the tip of my finger into his anus as I engulfed his cockhead in my mouth. Wrapping my lips around his shaft about an inch behind the ridge that ringed the crown of his manhood I began to massage the sensitive cleft underneath his cockhead with my tongue. He moaned and arched his back in response.

As he started to mouth fuck me I decided to still him by seeking his prostate with my finger. Slowly I slid my finger into his anal opening invading him and enticing him to still his body and release his creamy semen into my mouth. I found the firm pulsing knot of his swollen gland and stroked it gently. The touch of my finger on the core of his masculine sexuality made it quiver as it continued its rhythmic pumping. The chill of deep euphoria that I knew so well washed over him and held him down in helpless immobility; it was like an enormous erotic weight had been lowered on him, immobilizing him in erotic rapture.

His body had the urge to thrust and be the seeker of pleasure but euphoria lulled his brain into submission and robbed him of his control of his body. He lay still in anguished bliss as I tormented his arousal. All he could feel as he lay there immobile was my finger up his anal canal stroking his most secret spot and the heat of my mouth sucking on the crown of his erection. Together the two sensations were creating a cacophony of agonizing pleasure that hurt so bad they surmounted the fine line that divides pain and pleasure.

He was totally under my control ready to release for me; I needed to taste his essence on my tongue. I needed to slake my desire with the thickened warm cream of his passion, given to me in the agonized frenzy of orgasmic release. Suddenly his legs began to quiver and he began to gasp. The grip of orgasm was tightening and squeezing deep inside him. He was falling into the chasm of orgasmic ecstasy and it was going to be a hard fall. His balls drew up in preparation for a hard pumping climax.

In the milliseconds before the convulsions deep inside his anus began I reached up with my left hand and began to toggle his erect nipple. The cumulative sensations were more than he could bear.

With my lips wrapped tightly behind the ridge on his crown he began to pump his load as his anus convulsed on my finger and his perineum spasmed. I felt his prostate pumping and his cockhead swelling and shrinking rhythmically as he regurgitated his hot load of man cream, filling my mouth . Pulse after pulse of his hot thick semen flowed into my stomach as I drank hungrily from you.

He shuddered and quivered as his pelvis was consumed by the force of male orgasm unleashed. His anus, anal canal, perineum and cock all screamed in shrill acknowledgement of the shrill pleasure that gripped him and began to squeeze the cum from him in a paroxysm of exquisite agony. When it was over his balls were drained and his head was fuzzy.

Before the last shuddering spurt of cum was expelled from his rigid cock, the sweet calm peace that follows hard orgasm settled over him. But my own desire was not slaked. The tumescence of my own cock made it ache with the heaviness of orgasmic need. It hung heavy and hard in arousal. I needed yet one more way to share intimacy with this, this time by being inside him. I had never felt the urge to penetrate a man until that moment.

As he lay there is beatific euphoria I reached over to the nightstand and lubed my iron spike, in preparation to impale him. Once my cock was glistening with a slippery coating, I lifted his legs, holding them apart by grasping his ankles and holding his legs like they were motorcycle handle bars. His anus was exposed and relaxed from many Aneros sessions and the orgasm that he just experienced.

I lodged my glistening bulbous cockhead against his pink puckered opening. It fit perfectly in his anal opening just like a cork. I looked down at the highly erotic sight of my cockhead barely inside his opening parting the outer ring of his anus as I prepared to penetrate him. I leaned forward pressing my cockhead against the ring of his asshole. With surprising ease his opening yielded to me as I slid elegantly and slowly into him. He gasped at the pleasant sensation of a hot cock sliding into his anal canal.

From my standpoint the heat of his hot anal canal gently caressing my cockhead was like a powerful aphrodisiac. My head was suddenly swooning. I was experiencing the power of male sexuality and the very essence of a man. He had allowed me inside his body to experience his pleasure.

The sensation was exquisite. This was the first time I had ever fucked a man and it was serenely pleasurable. Slowly I began to thrust my pelvis. Back and forth I drew my long hard cock in and out of the sucking hole that held it, like a cellist drawing a bow across strings. As I did my cockhead gently massaged his prostate. In its post – ejaculative state it still was aroused by the tender rubbing of my crown. It began to harden in response. As it did waves of pre super O sensation began to rise in him.

As I pistoned in and out of him his own pleasure waves began to build. I began to talk in tones of sultry affection coaxing him to succumb and give me the satisfaction of feeling him orgasm on my cock. I speared him relentlessly pushing him closer and closer to the brink. Then it happened, the bliss that my cock inspired deep in his anal tract broke through the clouds and causing him to have a string of super orgasms. This time they were not on an aneros they were on the full girth of my erect cock deep in his asshole. He whined as he succumbed to wave after wave of anguished pleasure as my cock pushed him higher and higher.

The pleasure was so intense he actually screamed. Still I pistoned him impaling him and making the pleasure he felt become euphoria and then transform from euphoria to rapture. The touch of my wand on the core of his soul transcended him, numbing his brain again and carrying him to the distant place inside his mind where erotic sensual pleasure was all there was.

The desperate hunger of imminent orgasm began to tickle me deep in my anal canal. My own climax was approaching. I could feel the pressure of the cum welling up deep inside of me. To me the sexiest thing a man can do to another man is cum on his penis. So as I felt the spasm of my ejaculation begin, I pulled out from his anus and laid my glistening hard cock on top of his semi erect cock and released a stream of hot cum. I pissed several long ropes of hot cream onto his cock. The sensation of my hot cream coating it made his penis shudder and lurch.

The above thoughts and fantasy carried me through a two hour MMO session and it acknowledged the changing season of my sexual need. It has been a while since I have been with a man but I sense that will soon change.

My underpants are sopping and my cock is hard as I write this.