Stuck on a plateau? Here’s what finally worked for me, no substances or special tricks needed

Some background: I’ve been using Aneros on and off since November. I’ve been practicing kegels regularly since then, too. In that time, I’ve had one strong prostate orgasm, a few weak ones, and a lot of “close but not there” frustration. The strong orgasm I had happened maybe a month in while drunk and I had very little idea what I was doing or what was working. I couldn’t replicate it at all.

I was frustrated that I had to fantasize hard or really focus on porn to feel like I’m getting “close”, or that I had to drink or be on some other substance. The former is a bit of a strain and the latter is not something you want to make a habit.

Now, I’ve been spending a few hours on Aneros each day since Friday, and I haven’t masturbated since last Tuesday. I think that helped. I use the Aneros Helix Syn with a fairly large amount of lube (I use a lube shooter). I didn’t do any special relaxation technique, nor did I try any nipple play.

What finally worked for me was:

1. Sitting on the bed, knees bent and up, legs kind of spread outward so your knees can be together without them tipping over

2. Listening to music. Any music on youtube that claims to be good for meditating, relaxing, or focusing should be fine. I think it helps keep part of your brain occupied

3. Eyes closed. No porn, no erotic fantasies. I guess you can, but it might be distracting.

4. The contractions I did were best described as a form of the tug-of-war method, tighten your sphincter while repeatedly flexing your PC muscle between 10 and 50%, kind of like your doing quick kegels. Your PC muscle should tremble somewhat and your penis may look like it’s shaking a bit.

5. I focused on the sensations: basically, you notice what feels pleasurable and try to continue the type of contraction or flex you’re doing to sustain that feeling. As the pleasure gets better, try to imagine it expanding through your body.

6. I noticed I was sometimes relaxing my sphincter too much and it was muting the contractions. Make sure you’re not doing this. I had to remind myself to tighten it again and the pleasure continued escalating instead of plateauing. Don’t tighten any muscle above maybe 70% or so, though.

7. As I got closer, I imagined the sensations as a form of masturbation, that the pleasure I’m feeling is bringing me closer to something. I also imagined whatever pleasure I was feeling radiating outwards, until at some point it actually was. The whole session took maybe 30 minutes.

Also: you can have expectations of an orgasm. All the people here saying “you shouldn’t expect an orgasm” I think are doing more harm than good to those who read it, because it’s basically impossible not to think about an orgasm, but now you’ve psychologically convinced them that they’ll have an even harder time for thinking about it. This isn’t true, at least not for me. I think what’s really meant by this phrase is “don’t start ramping up your contractions with the purpose of escalating them to an orgasm”, and “your session may take a while to start producing results”.

I always think about the advice women give for going down on them: if they’re close, keep doing exactly what you’re doing. It’s counterintuitive to men because most penis stimulation will work just fine (or better) if it’s ramped up before orgasm. But it won’t work for women, and I don’t think it’ll work very well for prostate orgasms.

Regardless, hopefully some of these tips will help those who are in the same rut. You do *not* need liquor/weed for this.

Have fun.