Taking control of my sex life

My partner has super low sex drive due to medical, hormonal and situational reasons. I’m super supportive and patient but I have needs. Our progress or desire to have progress has stalled.
Finding prostate play has given me a new lease on life. I’m new to aneros with only a a few sessions so far and nothing amazing to report.
But I feel great, I have control, I have excitement, anticipation, new experiences.
What I love about sex, giving oral etc; is the female orgasm and it’s complexity. I feed off it, ride the wave, I love the endorphins.
But now I can have all that mediative and spiritual like experience on my own (or with partner). I have back taken control and it feels great!

Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/aneros/comments/r0xw8l/taking_control_of_my_sex_life/


  1. Totally in the same boat. Hid my love of anal play for years and finally talked about it and brought a prostate massager and a few toys recently. Now I can take care of myself a couple of times a week as my partner is completely unavailable for sex and intimacy due to medical reasons too.

    Much more calmer now and not sure she will be ever keen as it disgusts her a little but I told her I’d love for her to get involved one day. Would love to try pegging lol

    Power to you man, rock on and enjoy yourself

  2. Right here with ya, my wife currently working through some things and I’m sort of left to my own… devices. If you haven’t yet, find yourself a dildo that works! I love the aneros, it opened up the door to prostate sensation for me, and applying it’s lessons to other toys has taken orgasms to a new level. Hang in there, and take care of yourself!

  3. I got distracted driving divorced three years ago and had a dead bedroom. I’m upfront with the person I’m with now that if we progress to marriage I can’t have that situation again and that I will sleep with other people. Sometimes I feel selfish about that stance, but at the same time I’m sacrificing my life too.

  4. Good for you!!!!!

    I have done the same thing. Wife and I have not been able to have sex for over 2 years so learning about the prostate and then making that my own has been game-changing.

    I no longer crave her or sex as I now have this thing I can do that, in many ways, seems to be what I’ve been looking for anyway.

    That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to have sex. I absolutely do however, now I can give her the space that she needs to be able to come back to wanting sex again. I’m not following her around and constantly bugging her for it because I can take care of myself. It is truly life-changing and saved my marriage.

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