I discovered the Aneros website just last week, so this weekend I haven't spent much time on anything besides obsessively reading up on the subject and having breaks for food, sleep and bathroom. Haven't left the house since Friday and it is now Monday noon. But let's start from the beginning of my end.
In 1998, when I was 23, after having tried some lubed backdoor fingering, I got my first anal toy. This was a rod of thai jelly beads with double ends, one larger and one smaller with five beads each size.
I have got myself ten or so different toys over the past decade. In retrospect, these probably were more for the female body even though marketed as they would fit both. Their effects often disappointed me, but with a few exceptions, so at least they made me curious to try other toys once in a while.
The rod of beads for example gave good pleasure while slow-thrusting and if left inside, they could make my ejaculation stronger. Sometimes I also could take my hand(s) off my penis right before the finish line and the beads inside would take me across, with less friction and more pure pleasure as a result. This is still my favourite toy, probably because it bends, which many other toys don't.
Another toy I got when I was 26 was a big buttplug which was both inflatable and had vibration. I only managed to get that inside me once and I wasn't comfortable, but as an unexpected suprise gave me my first real ejaculation without having an erection once I started the vibration. With this toy I also learned my ass had its limits (one and a half inch across was a bit too much), so I haven't used it since then.
In the year 2005 I turned 30. I bought my last anal toy so far, but it really disappointed me. Less than two years ago I began to learn about the erotic effects of prostate massage, and largely due to my personal experience I was fascinated. I began collecting bits and pieces of information on the subject.
Some months ago I decided that it was time to buy something new again. Initially I had a naughty idea to replace some of my walks or bike rides with indoor solo sex. This time the toy had to be designed for men only, no matter the cost. This week, I finally revisited an old masturbation forum where all kinds of male toys were discussed, and while I was aware of several prostate massage products I found topics about the Aneros, which I hadn't heard about at all. I got a general impression that the products I already knew of were probably a waste of time and money. This claim was also new to me, so I had to find out more, which quickly lead me to some xtube videos and to this Aneros website.
What I saw was of course very tempting, so I started reading video comments, testimonals, and eventually the wiki – which was so well written I could not stop reading until only Advanced and Glossary remained. Half-way trough the wiki I understood that subtle internal stimulation could be a better way than both thrusting my anus and touching my penis. I should be able to verify this myself, so with some tricks of my own and a few new preparation tips from the wiki I inserted my old favourite toy very smoothly while sinking my body deep in the armchair. I also tied two wires of plastic clothesline between my legs in a way that my toy would be held in place like the Aneros is supposed to. By lifting one wire a little I was able to move it in or out of me.
First I re-familiarized some sensations from the past, but avoided my penis. Then I relaxed and listened to some porn while I made some contractions and relaxed some more. No bad or new feelings so far, so I started to rotate my toy from side to side in pace with my breathing, without moving it in or out, while shifting my legs and body to try different positions. With my feet supported by my computer desk, I put my legs fairly together, but they stared to shake. First I thought that i was having fatigue, but when I then shifted my legs to a more unstable position, the shaking stopped. So I put my legs together again, and the shaking resumed. I thought this was kinda cool, since I recognized the shaking, and even the toy I used when I was 26 had similar effects, but I didn't fully understand it at the time.
At this point, I stopped and decided the Aneros effects was very much true. Also, my body was boiling on the inside, like a cloud of pleasure with no way out. I did not care about this at the time – instead I removed my gadgets while becoming very determined that I wanted an Aneros, now! My usual online sex shop did not offer any Aneros models, so I went to another, something that I don't normally do easy. I was amazed how focused my actions were on placing an order. I went for the Helix given its moderate dimensions and good reputation. It should arrive later this week or next.
Now, two days later, my body is still boiling, and bringing myself to ejaculation did not reduce this. My body likes this very much, but my mind is concerned and is struggling to regain control. I try to relax with deep, slow breathing, which helps a little but the boiling returns on its own with the same intensity. The feeling reminds me of when I was a little boy and discovered my dad's hidden porn stash, and after reading Hustler stayed in a fever-like state to five in the morning, only this time it seems trapped in my body! I haven't slept much during the weekend, but I hope I will be alright and that my body will adapt to the new sensations, caused by which I do believe was my first serious prostate massage.
But I just cant help wonder if I am ready for what the future brings.
Will I be able to keep a clear mind, or will this feedback loop strong enough to engulf me like true love?