ed's journey

tried again today–doesn't seem like too much action for me–had bm, douche and large lube–this is needed for me–want movement to start things off, although it seems it is not so important once things are underway–did same with each aneros–got very good feelings going with panting and bouncing etc, mostly right side feelings with a little left side action toward the end–as i've said, it seems that i think of the less intense rubbing as being on the top of my prostate and on the right and the more intense rubbing as being lower on my prostate and on the left side of my body–i seem to have a mental image of this printed in my mind as i feel this happening–the right side starts things off and feels very good and brings me a little stiffy and a lot of precum and if i bounce right and get the rhythm and panting right it seems to shift to the left with much more intense rubbing and bouncing and eventually if i get the rhythm right it seems to take off from there– but it can't be forced nor controlled–i just feel what happens and respond–the bouncing and panting come naturally, they are what my body wants and if things get going all in the same direction it seems like the aneros buries itself and welds itself there and everything goes wherever it wants to go–my only control is to stop it when i get too tired out or can't breathe anymore–

ed's journey

had my first super o yesterday and i'm here again trying to duplicate it–lots of lube again after a douche–start with my helix again and then my 16 mm, followed by my progasm and then my 16 mm peridise again–basically did the same thing with each massager–got to the involuntary movement part and the bouncing and the very good feelings and the panting etc but never over the hump to the super o–it's great getting to the involuntaries so soon now, like i have been able to do these last few times–also great knowing what i am looking for and finally knowing that it really is all about letting go completely–there is no longer letting go and grabbing onto a feeling with a contraction–i don't use contractions at all–they keep things from happening–also when a feeling hits i no longer contract as a reaction–i don't know why or how i manage to do this,although the movement is so small now that it doesn't surprise me like it used to do– i relax and take whatever my body dishes out to me–the movement seems to be so small and fast that i don't perceive any movement at all–i do feel movement when i'm starting but when i get there all aneros movement seems gone, there is just this thing buried so deeply in me and seemingly welded to me that it seems a part of me–it seems to feel hotter too–it grabs onto my asshole and bounces me around without letting go– there is no me and it anymore while it is in control, just us

ed's journey

this is the session where i had the super o–i was talking about the quality of the feelings being different since i had the hives outbreak and i thought that i was a long way from getting back to where i was before the allergic reaction to the lyrica–i thought that my feelings were diminished and that i would have to work at getting that quality back–i was feeling pressure on my prostate instead of a delicious rubbing and no tickling like i had before–anyway on thursday i doubled lubed, about 2 to 3 teaspoons, as i wanted plenty of movement, which i thought had also been missing–i started off with the helix and got the same quality feelings but i could move it around and it moved on its own too–i worked with the helix for about 50 minutes and was getting a lot of response,that is, rubbing and quivering of my legs and a good feeling on my prostate–it felt like it was going farther and deeper than ever before–also my prick felt like it was big, which i knew was not true, but it felt like it was–then i switched to my 16 mm peridise and things went on the same from there–it didn't seem like anything was going to happen but i kept with it, not working but enjoying what was happening and relaxing all the way–no contractions to distract me either–just letting it go–then i started to feel what i call a poking on the right side, this is probably a rubbing on the top of my prostate–this makes my breathing start to accelerate and my legs start to quiver–i'm on my back with my legs bent with my heels on the bed, my hands on my chest–anyway i start to feel it and i start to bounce and my legs go crazy on their own, jumping from side to side and up and down, until some rhythm comes along and everything starts to build–my breathing goes ragged and i moan and pant very loudly–i feel the rubbing on the right and then it shifts to the left, what i associate with the lower part of my prostate, and it becomes more intense –this builds and builds and i feel the peridise dig into me all the way and it gets hotter and it seems to weld itself to me–i don't feel it moving at all but all of me is moving, bouncing and legs swaying and head bouncing and then out of nowhere, it seems as if a switch was thrown or a gear shifted, everything goes crazy, but in a controlled way with the rhythm perfect and i'm off–i just let go–i didn't try to do anything but let go and relax–cleared my mind and panted and moaned and bounced–it was the super o and different than i thought it would be–it just took complete control of me and bounced me around and shook me for what seems like a long time but was probably only 5 or 10 minutes–i couldn't tell the time–my mouth was so dry and i was so tired and it just shook me like a rag doll–it must have looked like articwolves's video–i was completely under its control–i was yelling and screaming and panting and my whole body was bouncing on the bed on my ass while my legs were flying up and down and every which way and my arms were bouncing off my chest and into the air–my head was screwing around and bouncing off the bed in rhythm with everything else–it was great but it was completely different from any sexual experience i've ever had–different but definitely something i want to repeat as soon as i can

ed's journey

wow!!!!!had my first super o–it was grand but much different than i thought it would be–more description later–just wanted to shout it out that i've had my first super o

ed's journey

did a lot of lube again–used only 16 mm peridise this time–got movement but still hardly any pleasant feelings–don't know if i should lay off to let prostate recover or whether my sessions will help it come back–still most of the feelings are of pressure and not pleasant rubbing or tickling–will keep at it though–maybe i should start a routine of those prostate massages i saw online–the ones of the external rubbing on the pubic area that i think feel so good and seem to wake up the prostate–maybe a regular diet of those will reinvigorate my prostate

ed's journey

lubed up quite well again and had movement–now have movement but not as much "feeling" as before, although this afternoon i had move feeling than this morning–the feeling is starting to get more like pleasure too–need to practice and gain feeling back in those nerves after the hives outbreak

ed's journey

had a session today with a double lube before insertion to make sure i had movement–i have movement, although not as much as before, but what i lack is the same feeling from the movement that i enjoyed–now it feels like pressure or just poking or rubbing and not pleasurable poking or rubbing like it used to feel–i can make the aneros move but it doesn't give me much feeling on my prostate–i only hope that i can condition it to feel more pleasurable like it used to do–used the mgx first for 30 minutes and then the 16 mm peridise for 20–i like to use the smaller device after starting with the larger as it seems that my ass has to grab more to get a hold on it than it does when i start off with the smaller first–it seems to be move active trying to control it, to get a "hand" on it

ed's journey

just wanted to say that i got a fungal infection in my lower pubic area that was misdiagnosed as herpes zoster and treated with lyrica from which i developed the severe hives as an allergic reaction–they were mainly concentrated in the groin area and upper legs and lower belly and were so severe that they were driving me crazy and keeping me from sleeping–it must have wiped out all memory from my rewiring with the aneros

finally got back to health and began my sessions again–have had several so far and i seem to have lost it–slowly getting better but am way behind from where i stopped–all those nerve endings that were jangled from the week of intensive hives and the itch stopping cream must still be asleep!–seem to have lost the movement on my toys and also the feeling of how to control my contractions like i used to–my pc contraction seems to be intact but i have lost a lot of control on my anal contractions–seems like i can no longer do an anal without the pc coming along too– i used to have the tickling, buzzing and rubbing on my prostate but now i don't get any of those feelings like i used to–i also had the "tapping" i could do with my pc contractions–now all i get is a strange thing that feels like the massager coming off the prostate with some force, sort of like it was pressed hard against the prostate and when it comes to the edge it slams off–using a lot of lube cause movement is practically nonexistent–i'm now back to waiting for involuntaries to hitch a ride on–i guess i need to be rewired all over again–i'm guessing that all that nerve stimulation with the hives has screwed up the rewiring that i had done with the aneros–it's probably more that than the time i spent without sessions

ed's journey

got a rash all over my body like an allergy–first doctor sent me to a dermatologist–said not herpes zoster but fungal infection and then allergic to bacitracin, which i put on after i scratches it the first time–so now a cream for the cock and balls, which are swollen and another cream for that and the whole body for the rash and itching–looks like i'll be sidelined for weeks–just applied the anti-fungal cream on cock and balls and lower pubic area and my cock is crying too much stimulation, while the rest of my body is crying scratch me again and again even if i get bloody–hardest thing in the world not to scratch during the evening and the night, when it seems to get the worst

ed's journey

no sessions for me lately as i have been stricken with shingles which presented itself in the pubic area just to the left and above my cock–wow–was very hard to resist scratching it but did except for the one time i awoke at 4 in the morning scratching it like hell–so not much damage from that reaction–wondering where i'll be when i continue my sessions as it will be the longest time between sessions since i started in late jan–should probably be at least 3 weeks, been a week already, before i can stand and stimulation down there–the urge to scratch and the tickling sensation are phenomenal so there's no concentrating on a subtle feeling in my prostate